THE HUSBAND WHO DOESN'T WANT THE WIFE'S SEX-strictly for married couple

Mwikali was lying naked in bed. Exhausted. She was wearing a smile. A glow on her face.

Her legs were spread. Her arms thrown wide.

Mwikali's phone rang.

She struggled lifting up her head to pick up the phone which was on the lamp stool just next to the bed.

She picked up the phone. It was her female friend calling. She answered.

"Hi girl" Mwikali answered with a sleepy voice.

"Are you sleeping?" Her friend asked her.

"Nope. I am just well done. My husband has just made sweet love to me and my body is completely done. He is great in bed" Mwikali said.

"Eh, sis. You are there making love and we are over here about to start our Chama?" The friend asked.

Mwikali laughed and said, "What can I do? My husband wanted sex and so I gave him sex. I am sorry, I won't make it for Chama today. I will MPESA you my contribution. Girl I can't even drive right now. The sex was so good, my legs are still trembling. My body needs some time to calm down" Mwikali said as she stretched her body.

"What's the secret?" The friend asked.

"The secret to what?" Mwikali sought to know.

"The secret to a great sex-life? I love my husband and I know he loves me. But I can't even remember the last time we made love. It's like he doesn't find me sexy any more" explained the friend.

"Well, is he a boobs person, a butt person or a hips person?" Mwikali asked.

"Aaahm. I don't know" the friend answered.

Mwikali turned to the side while speaking to the phone, "What, you have no idea what your husband's favourite woman's body part is? Girl, you need to learn your husband"

"I thought all a man cares about is the vagina?" Said the friend.

"My dear, making love is more than the vagina. Men are visual and they love to touch. Find out which body part he loves and present that body part nicely to him. If it is your butt, bend over in front of him suggestively, rub your butt on him, dance for him. If it is your chest, wear see through clothes when just the two of you, position your chest before him, wear either a bra that shows off your chest or stay bra less, show him your nipples, try a wet t-shirt sometimes. If it is your hips, whine your waist and dance for him, wear tight stuff, flaunt those hips, excite him"

"I think he is a butt guy. But I feel so self-conscious about it. I get shy being naked before him. My butt is big and full of stretch marks" the friend confessed.

"Now you. If you are shy in front of your husband, who will you be free with? Us women are the ones who beat ourselves down. That big butt of yours had to have stretch marks to grow in size. Your stretch marks are beautiful, be proud of them. Let your husband marvel at your buttocks. Maybe he desires to grab and play with your butt but you deny him. Girl, your body and sexiness is not for you, it is for him. If you are standing in the way of him enjoying your sexiness then you are failing as a wife. Be confident naked" Mwikali told her.

"Sometimes he talks to my butt as if it has life. I honestly used to think he married me for my butt. He looks at my butt like it speaks to him. I find that weird" the friend said.

Mwikali laughed as she laid on her back.

"Do you know how many wives wish their husbands would do that? You should be grateful. When a man loves his wife's body, he gets weird. He can even become a freak. Let him be weird. Allow his sexuality to be expressed raw. Enjoy it. Play along. Don't be too rigid; loosen up. Too many wives are uptight in the bedroom. What do you wear to bed?"

"A t-shirt, a track, a pair of socks and stockings on my head depending on my hairstyle" said the friend.

Mwikali laughed.

"What are you laughing at? I feel comfortable in them" the friend told Mwikali.

"Oh no girl! That is not how you ask for sex. If you want sex, you dress for sex. I have seen you going to work, you dress up. You should put up the same effort to dress up for sex. If you will not wear a sexy lingerie or clothes that are light and free yet showing your nipples and curves then sleep naked. Remember, men are visual and they love to touch. Whatever you wear, look at yourself in the mirror and judge for yourself if you look yummy. A woman can have a gorgeous body but she hides it behind boring clothes. Gorgeous is not what the media says, but your natural beauty. I hope you brush your teeth too at night" Mwikali spoke.

"I do. Of course I do" said the defensive friend.

"Good, cause good breath attracts kisses and good hygiene around the vagina makes him want to make love and to lick and touch you" Mwikali said.

"Lick me? Isn't that yuck?" The friend got shocked.

"You mean, he has never licked your clit? Are you serious?" Mwikali was astonished. She changed the hand that held the phone.

"He has wanted to many times but I have said no. I don't like him looking at my private area" the friend said.

"But he is your husband. You are one flesh. It is part of foreplay. In fact, anything sexual you both desire to do, you two can do it. God created the clit with powerful sensations. The clit is there purely for pleasure. Do you know how wonderfully sensitive your clit is?" Mwikali asked.

"No, I thought he should just focus on the vagina. He goes in gets his orgasm and then it is done" said the friend.

"What about you? What about your orgasm? Do you orgasm?" Mwikali questioned.

"A woman doesn't have to orgasm? Right?" Asked the friend.

"Do you orgasm?" Mwikali questioned again.

"I don't think I do" the friend said.

"That is because you are too rigid. You have rules when it comes to sex. The only rule a married couple should have is to be faithful to each other. Relax. Let him explore your clit. He wants to. Let him lick you, touch you, penetrate you. Relax and let him please you. Don't block him or frustrate him yet he is horny for you. Girl, orgasms are sweet; but you won't get them when you overthink. A man feels good when he makes the female body orgasm, you are denying him that good feeling" Mwikali revealed.

"He cums so quickly though. I keep telling him he needs to last. His penis has a problem" her friend complained.

Mwikali leaned on her other side and said, "Oh no, don't ever make him feel bad about his penis. Never talk negatively about the one and only penis that should satisfy you. He cums quickly either because your vagina is too sweet or he wants to end it quickly because he is horny but you are passive and boring. If you make sex exciting, he will learn to prolong it because he wants it to last. Keep changing sex positions, when you feel he is about to cum, deny him the climax by pausing or removing his penis from inside you so that you do a different style. You do different sex positions right? Or is it just missionary?"

"What is missionary?" The friend asked.

Mwikali smiled and said, "That is when you lie on your back and spread your legs, he makes love to you while on top of you"

"Yap. That's the one we do. That is the only one we do" the friend answered.

"That is the only one you do? Oh no girl. Your body is capable of more, you can do doggie, sit on him and ride him, do it leaning on the side. Wait a minute, have you ever been the one who initiates sex?" Mwikali asked.

"No. I thought that is the work of the husband?" The friend sought clarity.

Mwikali spoke, "Sex is not for the man alone. Women are sexual beings too, you have sexual needs too. Men don't love a sexually passive wife, they want a wife who can show him she wants his sex too. He wants you to make moves on him too. Tease him, seduce him, strip for him, take your fingers inside his pants and rub his penis to hardness, lick and touch his nipples, be the first to kiss him. Don't just sit and wait for him to always do all the work. He wants you to want him too. Why are you so shy about sex?"

"I grew up thinking it's a no go zone, a taboo. Maybe that has led me to being apprehensive about it" the friend explained.

"Oh yes. The world has damaged the view of sex. Because sex has been abused and misused, it is easy to see it as dirty and evil. But sex is from God. God wants you and your husband to enjoy it in intimacy, don't spit on God's gift to your marriage. The Bible says Abraham knew his wife when it talks about them making love. Sex makes you two know each other and be more one, you are one flesh. Your husband will not know you if you close your legs, hide your clit or be ashamed of your stretch marks. Be unapologetically naked and horny for your husband. I have to end the call dear, my husband is back from the shower and I see he is horny again. Talk to you later. Have fun"

"Thanks girl. God bless. Have fun too" the friend said then hanged up.

Later that night, the friend texted Mwikali on her phone.

The text said, "Thank you for the talk girlfriend. I have just had an awesome orgasm. My body feels so good. My husband did things to me I have never felt before. I have never seen him this sexually excited. We're waiting for him to cool then harden up again for round two. I thank God for you'"

Contacts Evan Iwunze +2347065115221 for counseling

WHY FOREPLAY IS IMPORTANT -FOR THE MARRIED ONLY

Foreplay is the act of flirting, fondling, licking, kissing, rubbing or visually teasing your spouse in a sexual manner. It is the activity that happens before sexual intercourse. It is important because...

1. It hardens his penis more. When foreplay is done right, the man's hardness is more intense and can't help but release lots of precum which makes sexual intercourse sweeter. It makes the hardness last longer too

2. It makes her really wet. When she is sufficiently wet, she enjoys his penis inside her more surrounded by her lubrication, he enjoys being inside her more because it makes the in and out rhythm smoother

3. It shows care, that you are not just thinking about your sexual needs

4. It encourages reciprocation, this is because when your spouse prepares you, you naturally feel the need to prepare him/her too

5. It makes you discover new things about your spouse. This is because foreplay allows you two to play around with other parts of each other's body beyond the penis and the vagina. The body has alot of secrets waiting to be explored

6. It communicates love. Foreplay shows that it is more than just sex, you build a connection

7. It heights the stimulation. Pleasure varies in degree. Foreplay makes the feeling more intense

8. It builds up the power of the climax. If you want a powerful climax, build it up with foreplay, don't rush into it

9. It gives you time to get your spouse in the mood. Not every time you are in the mood your spouse will be in the mood too, foreplay invites your spouse to want you as much as you want him/her

10. It can lead to climax. Yes, when the foreplay is good, it can lead to climax without any sexual intercourse. Introducing you two to a variety of pleasure

FOR MARRIAGE COUNSELING OR ADVICE TO GET YOUR HUSBAND ONLY TO YOUR SELF

CHAT Evan Iwunze ON WHAT'S APP +2347065115221

KNOW THIS ABOUT MARRIAGE

1. Marriage is not for quitters

2. You will feel proud of yourself looking back knowing that you honoured your vows

3. If you do marriage right, it will bring out the best in you and in your spouse

4. Sex is important but not the only thing in marriage

5. When younger, make love as much as you can, enjoy it. A time is coming when all you have are memories

6. Friends will come and go, you will know so many people as a married person, but keep your spouse your priority

7. Don't stay together for children, eventually they will leave you two. What will you have to hold?

8. Growing old doesn't mean you cannot make your spouse feel special, keep making his/her heart beat

9. Do not harden your heart, otherwise marriage will be too great a burden

10. Do not hold grudges, otherwise stress will kill you

11. Eventhough you two are married, don't forget to build yourself, and work on your goals as an individual. Don't lose you

12. Not every advice is good advice. Discern

13. Love your spouse the best way you can, not as a reward to your spouse for treating you right, but because you have personally chosen to

14. It is not for you to say you are a good husband/wife but for your spouse to say I have a good husband/wife

15. Don't work too hard chasing after money for your family that you lose your family

16. Praying for your spouse is your personal responsibility that you cannot delegate to another person

17. Start each day with warm words and the tone of the day will be good

18. Don't be scared of aging, be scared of aging without a purpose or a legacy in mind

19. As you work, think about retirement. Save, invest, plan. You will not always have the energy you have

20. Fathers, don't disconnect from your children as they grown up. If you do, you will want them near you in your old age but they will struggle to bond with you

21. Mothers, don't hurt your children with words. Mummy wounds are difficult to heal from

22. Remember what you sow in your younger years of marriage, you will reap in your older years

23. Marriage is possible if the two work on it

24. You may pretend to the outside world you two are happy but behind closed doors, you two know the true state of your union. Stop living a public lie, have true love

25. Every marriage has dark spots but the wise couple keep the light on

26. If you feel like quitting; step back, breathe, be objective and most likely you will realize you don't have to quit. Don't always trust feelings, wait them out

27. One day you will give an account to God for how you treated your spouse, may God be pleased with you

28. What a blessing it is to have lived having loved and been loved

Why I should always fight my partner

My parents were at it again that morning. As kids, we were never in happy moods whenever we saw them fighting and tearing at each other. It was a Monday morning and we were all set to go to school.

By seven o’clock, we were waiting in the sitting room. I was dressed already preparatory for school. My three younger ones, Samson, Victor and Rita sat across the armchair. They too were ready and set to leave.

My mother did not wake up to make breakfast. I sensed when it was past six that she and my father were probably at it again.

When it was a few minutes past six and I began to hear noises from their bedroom, I quickly went into the kitchen and began to prepare some noodles with fried eggs which we would all take to school that morning.

I put the food in different food flasks for all of them and arranged them in each person’s basket. Rita was the first to finish bathing. She came to join me in the kitchen as I was dishing the food. Little did I know that no one was going to eat anything that morning.

“These people have started again this morning,” Rita grumbled. Her eyes showed that she was not happy. “When will they ever stop quarrelling?”

“I don’t know,” I mumbled dryly. “Maybe when they begin to grow grey hairs that is when they will stop. Sometimes I feel very ashamed of myself. They are the only adults in this estate that are always fighting. This is not proper.”

Rita shook her head. “The fault is always from Mum. When I grow up, I will not quarrel with my husband.”

She looked at me in a manner that suggested how troubled she was. Parents should know that whenever they quarreled, their kids suffered the more. Rita looked at me tearfully and asked;

“Will you quarrel with your wife when you grow up?”

I told her I was never going to fight with my wife. Sometimes I felt like suggesting to my parents to annul the union if they both could not manage their differences. But who was I to complain?

I was only a child. I was ten years old. Rita was eight. Samson was seven and Victor was four. My parents stopped procreating after Victor was born. And since then, they had always been at loggerheads.

When we were all prepared and my father hadn’t yet to come out, I sent Samson to go and knock on their door.

“Daddy, we are ready.” We heard him say. The screams and chants of scorn increased. My mother’s voice was high-pitch. She raved and vituperated endlessly.

“I regret ever agreeing to marry you. You are a very stupid man. You think I am as stupid as you are? Look at you! A hopeless man!”

“You call me a hopeless man and yet you have gummed yourself to me like a leach. Leave, you will not leave. Get a divorce, you will not get. Who is now hopeless between you and me?”

The door creaked open and we all heaved sighs of relief. My father was wearing a pair of camouflage knickers. That was what he wore most of the time if he didn’t go to work. He was not a soldier. He had never been one. But he had a friend who was a lieutenant cornel and it was this friend of his that had given Daddy the knickers. I remember the day some soldiers were trying to harass him and he had promptly called his friend who spoke to the military men on the phone and brought the situation to normalcy.

“Are you all ready? Gideon, hope you have made breakfast for everyone already.”

“Yes Daddy,” I nodded.

“That was very thoughtful of you. May God continue to give you more wisdom as my first child to always do this in spite of the fact that your mother would not let us have breathing…”

The words were still on his lips when he grabbed my younger brother’s arm to lead him out of the house. I took the car keys from the TV stand and as I was about to stand up from the chair, I saw my mother storm out of the bedroom. Her eyes were red like embers. In her hand was a big bottle.

“Are you trying to turn my children against me? Useless man!” she barked like a rabid dog.

Like a hill melting down the valley in an earthquake, my mother jumped on my father with all her might. Samson was in front of them. When I turned back, all that I heard was a loud bang. My father came crashing on the ground. My mother still held a bottle in her hand.

She wanted to smash the bottle on my father’s head but she missed by whiskers. The bottle came heavily down my younger brother’s head.

The shattered pieces fell onto the floor like confetti. Presently, Samson fell flat on his stomach and lay there motionless. Blood immediately began to drip down his head like ink from a broken biro. The world stood still for all of us as we stared blankly at my brother not knowing what to do.

“Hey my God!” screamed my mother exasperatedly with her palms covering her mouth. “I have killed my son. I have killed my son. God, I have killed him.”

As she wailed, my father quickly gathered Samson from the floor and off he went with him into the car. My brother’s uniform was soaked with blood. He was motionless. Helplessly, we all watched as my father drove madly out of the estate.

We did not go to school that day and none of us had the appetite for food. We didn’t go the day after. The week went by with bitterness in our hearts.

My brother Samson was a very intelligent boy. He was always coming first in his class. Twice, he was given double promotion. And most of the things that I didn’t know in sciences, he already knew them. And he was only in primary four!

And of all the people in the world, it was my brother, Samson’s head that my mother’s bottle chose to smash that morning.

No one heard anything from my father until after two days. Even when my mother called him, he refused to disclose which hospital he’d taken my brother to. He said he was so angry that he could do something nasty if he set eyes on my mother.

When he returned three day later, he looked twenty years older.

“We are selling this house,” he declared rather coldly. “Samson needs six million naira to enable him do a brain surgery. I have two million. If we don’t sell this house, I can’t raise the balance.”

I felt as if a fire burned in my heart. A tear fell off my eye even though I tried hard to suppress the grief melting in my throat like a cube of ice.

We had only moved into the house about seven months before. Now, for one act of parental irresponsibility, we were just about losing it. This was not fair. It was not fair at all. But if it could save my brother, what was a property compared to life?

Three days later, some people came and bought our four-bedroom flat. The buyer gave us six months to move out. He was filled with compassion when my father told him what the money was going to be used for.

“I would have loved to take possession of the house immediately but with the issue on ground, let me give you more time.” The buyer told my father.

Samson was to be flown to India. My father couldn’t meet up with the travel documents. He quickly sold his car and my mother’s own. I was to find out later that what had caused the fight between my mother and father that Monday morning was that my mother had requested for a new car. My father wanted her to wait until the end of the year but she said the time was too far because she wanted to use the car on the anniversary of her club.

Just for a car! My mother had never worked all her life but she had everything she needed. She travelled everywhere she wanted because she belonged to many associations. Twice, my father had tried to set her up in business but she could not manage it well. It was for this reason that my father vowed never again to invest any money on her project again.

My aunt once told me that my father loved my mother to a fault. According to her, my father could do anything to make her happy. But in spite of all the things he did for my mother, they were never at peace. It made me realize that indeed money wasn’t really the solution to our problems. With all the money in the world, if happiness and peace are eroded, then the money meant nothing. Whichever way anyone looked at it, my mother was at fault.

My mother had always lamented to my hearing that she could have married a better and richer person than my father.

The day finally came when my father was to fly Samson to India. There had been argument between the two of them over who should accompany my brother but in the end, my father won. He said he could not leave my brother in the hands of my mother because it was she who had put him in that condition.

It’s been four months now since all these things happened. We lost Samson in spite of all the money that was sunk into trying to give him life. The pain was too much for my father and the rest of us. As I write this story, my parents have now separated. My mother has returned to her father’s house because my father vowed never to take her back again.

Although I miss her so much, I am very much in support of the decision my father has taken. Let her remain there for now.

When Rita asked my father when my mother would return, he simply replied; “Until she is cured of her madness.”

That was hopeful. It made us to understand that someday, the two might come back together again. But no one knows when it would be. I believe they have both learnt their lessons even though it is quite painful that it had to cost Samson his life.

“Will you ever fight with your wife when you grow up?” it was my sister; Rita. She asks this same question most of the time.

I shook my head and promptly responded; “God forbid! I will never do a thing like that.”

As a child of ten, I have learnt a very bitter lesson about life. In one day, my once happy family lost everything; so much money and a precious life. No! Never will I touch or quarrel with my wife when I grow up. Never!

.

ONE BLACK MONDAY by Japheth Prosper

THINGS WOMEN SHOULD DO TO KEEP THEIR HUBBY AND HOME

1. The Use Of Word

Honestly Speaking, every woman has the power to make her marriage or break it by the way she speaks with her husband. If a Woman is careless with her manner of speaking to her husband when talking together, she may provoke him often, and this is very bad for couple.

Meanwhile, A woman who knows how to use the word of the mouth will make an excellent wife. A woman that must keep other adventurous women away from her husband must be meek and kind to her husband and be ready to watch her language always.

Sometimes your husband will really be the one provoking you, yes he really want to get you mad so that you can behave rashly and he would be able to deal with you, Some men are like that. All you need to do is switch to amiable tone and tell him “Honey, please help me to really understand what you want me to do right now, i’m begging”, then you move on.

2. Learn To Say “I am Sorry”

There is no way a man and a woman will live together all their lives without a time of disagreement. In such circumstance, always remember the saying “we disagree to agree”. Those who do not understand how marriage works will always think that quarrel with their husband is an opportunity to show everyone that they are street fighters, they want to show people they can fight.

If a woman must keep her marriage and scare away intruders, she must be eager to apologize to her husband. Whenever she does what is wrong, A woman must learn How to say “I am sorry”. Your ability to apologize is a proof of your maturity and intelligence.

Do not provoke your husband because it can expose your marriage to danger of collapse.

3. Sustain Your Beauty

Today on roads,environment & other places are full of women, ladies that are gorgeously dressed, beautiful looking, who are still single and searching. This group had become a great threat to married women who loves to dress shabbily simply because they have one or two kids at home they are nursing.

The fact still remains that women must retain their unique outlook which the man saw in them before he picked interest and ask them out in the first place. A woman should endeavour to sustain her internal and external beauty at all time, as this is what gives the woman her real appeal as a wife.

4. Give Him Attention

Many women take pride in having their way in any issue that comes up between them and their husband. Some families are being affected because the wife had choose to take the place of the husband, she does not listen to anyone except she done it her own way.

Men are scared are scared by such women, who will never listen to them. If a woman desires to enjoy her marriage and keep other women away, listening to your husband is the beginning of a great marriage

5. Respect His Relations

It is not possible for a woman to be married to just only her husband and not have anything to do with the husband’s family.

If a woman is trying to prevent the family of the husband from coming nearer to her husband, she might annoy her husbands family to conspire against her. Blood is thicker than water, the man is likely to become irritated by his wife. A woman must love and honour her husbands relation.

6. Prayers

A prayer less woman is a powerless woman. It is expected that a woman should be strong in prayers. You must regularly pray for your husband.

You can destroy every seen and unseen enemies of marriage through prayers. Intercede for your husband.

7. Never Use The Word “Divorce”

Divorce is one of the weapons that bring shame and sorrow to any family.

When a woman decides to be headstrong and continually willing to have her way and never think of divorce as alternative (unless the husband is maltreating you badly).

Accept your husbands uniqueness, there is no perfect man out there.

8. Good Cooking

A woman is expected to be a soul provider in all ramification to the need of her household.

Any woman that knows how to cook has already won the heart of her husband. A woman that doesn’t know how to cook delicious meal may be endangering her marriage

4-6 BIG SECRETS IN MARRIAGE

Secret 4:

Every marriage has different levels of success. Don't compare your marriage with any one else. Two marriage can look IDENTICAL, but can never be EQUAL. I hope you are hearing me? Never compare the love level from another marriage with yours. Learn to be patient, and keep sprinkling water where you want the green grasses to grow.

Secret 5:

To get married is declaring war. When you get married you must declare war against enemies of marriage. Some enemies of marriage are:

- Ignorance

- Prayerlessness

- Unforgiveness

- Third party influence

- Stinginess

- Stubbornness

- Lack of love

- Rudeness

- Laziness

- Jezebels

- Delilahs

- Disrespect

- And Cheating.

To keep your marriage you have to be willing to fight DIRTY with prayer and hardwork. A happy marriage is not for couples who want to be CLEAN.

Secret 6:

There is no perfect marriage. There is no ready made marriage. Marriage is hard work. Volunteer yourself to work daily on it. Marriage is like a car that needs proper maintenance and proper service. If this is not done it will break down somewhere exposing the owner to danger or some unhealthy circumstances. Let us not be careless about our marriages.