MARRYING BEFORE 30

First of all, I married at 30 years, due to some reasons beyond my control. Therefore, I understand that circumstances may prevent people from marrying before or at 30.

The post made about marrying earlier than 30 applies to those who have the means to marry at that age, but are indecisive. It also applies to ladies who have suitors but are also indecisive. 

Ask anyone who is married, he or she will tell you that he/she would have preferred to marry before 30. Growing with your kids gives peace of mind and equally helps you see life from their viewpoint.

If you marry after 30, there is the tendency that you may have children who are still undergraduates by the time you are 65. At 65, you should be talking about retirement and not paying school fees. Your children should be independent at 65.

Even if you don't have kids due to one or two health issues, early marriage gives you and your spouse the opportunity to correct the problem and still stand a chance of having children. Even if you lose a baby, it gives you the chance to have another.

Having kids after 30 for a lady comes with a lot of health challenges. There is a reason why ladies mature from 9 years. I write this from personal experience and from what we hear the doctors tell us at the hospital.

My advice is this - Nigeria does not have a social welfare system where the government looks after you at old age. Your children are your social security scheme. Have them as early as possible,  grow up with them, play football and other games with them, then give you and your spouse the chance to enjoy your marriage again, when they have left the house.

My submission does not apply to those who do not want to get married,  but think about the decision to stay single carefully. Old age in Nigeria is brutal, when you have no one to look after you or any retirement home where you can be taken to.

Your children are your children. An Ngwa adage says - once a corpse begins to decay and smell, a friend who was deemed more important or closer than a brother or sister,  disappears.

NOTE: Nigeria has no old people's homes, be wise!(copy)

Must a lady be married to earn/get respect? *NO*

Must a lady be married to earn/get respect?

*The answer is a big NO*

A change in one' s marital  status does not in any way buy one respect.

It comes with one's worth, achievement and prestige.

The society, sometimes, attack more important to the married.

Some will say, "There  are virtues and so much respect, rest of mind and accomplishment as a woman while married that your fame and wealth can't give you while ummarried"

But, am here to encourage  you to appreciate your present status FOR no condition is permanent.

S O O N! , IT SHALL BE 👇

From single to married.

From zero to hero.

From nobody to somebody.

God dey!

Your Happiness Is Most Paramount.🙏

*True Analysis of Life.*

*True Analysis of Life.*

After Secondary School:

All your school and class mates will go in different directions into the world.

*CATEGORY 1*

Some have completed universities and are now:

Professors,

Doctors, 

Engineers, 

Teachers, 

Pilots, 

Lawyers, 

Administrators, 

Imams,

Pastors,

Ministry overseers,

Church overseers, &

Business tycoons etc.

*CATEGORY 2*

Some are married, 

Some have given birth,

Some are still searching and waiting on the Lord.

*CATEGORY 3*

Some are dead, don't forget that too.

*CATEGORY 4*

And others are on the sick bed.

*CATEGORY 5*  

Some are running their higher degrees: Masters, PHD, etc.

*CATEGORY 6*

Some haven't even gained admission into the tertiary institution and may NEVER be able to.

*CATEGORY 7*

Some own companies

*CATEGORY 8*

Some are now Directors and major  shareholders in global companies.

Hmmmmmmm!!!

How do you feel when you meet your classmates, and it seems like he/she has accomplished their   dreams and you're not yet close to yours? 

So many thoughts run through your mind, right?

First, you think God has not been fair to you.

How about the ones you meet on the street wearing dirty cloths  and still struggling for survival? 

Do you get the same thoughts running through your mind?

*I guess, NO.*

Don't forget too that some are already dead.  

Somehow it feels natural to have that  feeling of jealousy for those mates who seem better off,  but it is really unnecessary.

There is no room for regrets.

We are all different and our paths to greatness are also not the same in distance.

Some might have arrived earlier before you and some after you, but whatever level you find yourself in life, please keep trying to break limitations and move further.

Celebrate the success of others, it's an indication that yours too shall surely come.

Your friend buys a car now, be happy with him/her. 

Remember when you'll buy yours, 

theirs might not  be the latest again.

There's no permanent champion, but current champion.

Life is not about competition. Do not be in a race with anyone. 

Remember, we may seem to be reading the same book but different chapters at different times.

Don't let the passion in you kill the desire in you, keep it burning. 

What you're passing through today;

Write it down because one day, the world would be ready to read it, they'll become part of your success story.

There's no height you cannot attain.

Believe in yourself. Define your goals.

 *Recognize distractions**and don't stop striving*

*Spend time teaching yourself, because those things that mainly take people to the top are the things they devoted their time to develop.*

*Don't be intimidated by your friend's success* 

The sky is wide enough for birds to fly without touching one another. 

*Value every little thing that God brings into your life.*  

*Love God and obey Him.* 

*For with God, all things are possible.*

*Now to those who are on top, Never forget to give a helping hand to those who are down. Because Life is full of uncertainties. The one you pull up today, may be the one to hold your hands and prevent you from falling tomorrow*

*A piece of advice there.*

*Food for thought for all school and class mates.*

 *Share this to all your mates and let them realize that God has a purpose for everyone* 

*Always be humble and thank God for His Grace in your lives.*

*May God bless us all.*

WHAT BEING THE HEAD OF THE HOME MEANS

Many men love to lay claim of them being the head of the home, but the head of the home is not a title but a function. Being the head of the home means...

1. Staying faithful to your one wife. How can you break the same home you claim you are the head of?

2. Promoting and maintaining teamwork with your wife. Many husbands destroy the spirit of teamwork by not involving their wives in decision making. Being head doesn't mean you know everything or you make all decisions, but that you provide the right direction and environment where well-thought out decisions can be made

3. Praying for your family, both with your wife and on your own. How can you be the head and not led by God?

4. Treating your wife properly because the wife dictates the mood of the house. If she is treated badly, the mood in the home becomes dull, cold, draining and unpleasant

5. Coming up with a vision for the family in partnership with your wife. Where will you live ten years from now, which schools will the children go to? What growth will be attained as a family twenty years from now?

6. Providing for the family, and if your wife is earning money too, then being the head also means encouraging and supporting her work and contribution as well as making sure that money is used well

7. Spending adequate time at home with your family. How can you be the head of a home to which you are like a visitor?

8. Modelling to your children how adults behave, how problems are solved and what it means to grow up

9. Allowing God to reign in the home. Spiritual nurturing is not for women alone. The Lord reigns best in the homes where both husband and wife are submitted to God. Teach your children Godly ways by being Godly

10. Protecting your home from enemies, your friends, your parents, intruders and women who try to seduce you

11. Excelling outside the home. Guard the integrity and reputation of your name because your home and family carries your name

12. Providing leadership through service. Leadership is not sitting on the sofa, legs raised and giving orders. It means helping out with the chores, serving your wife especially when she is exhausted or pregnant, getting your hands and clothes dirty as you play with the children, doing more than what is required of you at home. This is your family

13. Being wise enough to walk away from a fight with your wife, choosing not to hit or slap your wife, being humble enough to say sorry when you're wrong, letting petty domestic arguments go. Maintaining peace at home. You are the key to peace at home

14. Making sure no one; not your wife, not any of your children feels left out or misunderstood. No child should feel like a blacksheep, unwanted, a burden or that dad is favouring one child over another; whether that child is biologically yours or not

15. Being active in seeking solutions at home. When troubles or problems knock on the door of your home, man up, find solutions. Problems will not solve themselves

16. Disciplining your child/children with love. Do not instil fear. Correct with love. Open the eyes of your child/children to be able to discern between right and wrong. Like the father of the Prodigal Son, let your arms of unconditional love be ever open

16. Covering your child/children when they make mistakes and to keep them from making mistakes. Sometimes we get mad and angry at our children for the mess they make, yet we did not give them instruction and capacity to navigate through issues. We accuse our children of bringing us shame, wasting our money or failing us yet we did not cover them by shielding them from themselves. It's like parents getting angry their teenage daughter is pregnant yet as parents they never prepared their daughter for sex and the world. We expect our children to think like us yet we left them alone to find the way; we have more years of experience. Give advise even when not asked because children often don't know how to ask for advise or if they need advise

© COUNSELING

+2347065115221

YOUR HEALTH IS YOUR WEALTH

PERSONAL HYGIENE FOR WOMEN.

Personal hygiene for women is all the more important.

Women are essentially prone to certain infections like UTI and Yeast Infection.

These infections are often a result of not following basic genital hygiene.

Here are some hygiene tips for women

1-  *Wash After Urinating*

Every time you pass urine, there is chance of developing infections.

The uric acid from the urine remains in the few left over drops.

So, wash your genitals with water and then wipe it dry with toilet paper.

2 - *Keep Pelvic Region Shaved*

Pelvic hair is the cause of many infections, so, shave off pelvic hair reguarly.

It is not a cosmetic but health prerogative.

3 - **Change Underwear Regularly*

You need to change your underwear at least twice daily.

Wearing the same underwear for a long time make it soggy and dampness is a store house of infections.

4. - *Use Panty Liners*

When you are having increased vaginal discharge (during ovulation) use panty liners.

They are not as thick as pads but they absorb the discharge instantly.

5. - *Change Pads Every 4 Hours*

No matter how little you bleed during your mentruation, you need to change pads every 4 hours on all 5 days.

This is to ensure that stale blood doesn't cause any vaginal infections.

6. - *Keep Armpit Shaved*

Armpit hair is the main cause of body odour, so, keep your armpit clean.

It also prevents sweaty armpits.

7 - *Wash After Intercourse*

Once you are sexually active, you have opened yourself to many sexually transmitted infections.

So, always wash your genital immediately after sex.

8 - *Don't Hold Back Urine*

You must not hold back pee when you feel the urge to urinate.

This is very bad for your kidneys.

And it also makes you prone to urinary infections.

9. - *Don't Wear Tight Bras*

Many women make the mistakes of wearing the wrong size of bra.

Tight bras are extremely unhealthy for you.

They can even lead to tumors and cause blood circulation problem.

If you have skin rashes, it might be due to tight bras.

YOUR HEALTH IS YOUR WEALTH.

*The Bad Attitudes That Can mess up your Marriage.*

 *SINGLE AND MARRIED* 

1) *DARING YOUR HUSBAND TO BEAT YOU:* You block the doorway, then dare him to beat you up and see what will happen. A Lot of women have done this and end up regretting it.

2) *DARING YOUR HUSBAND TO SLEEP WITH ANOTHER WOMAN:* You will be making a major mistake if you dare your husband to sleep with another woman. You may live to regret it.                        

3) *NEGLECTING YOUR BODY AND LOOKS BECAUSE YOU ARE MARRIED:* 

“I am married I can relax, after all, who is looking at me.?” He married you Slim, sexy and trendy. Next thing you become obsessed, dirty and shabbily dressed.

It is the mistake of most careless married women.

4) *DENYING YOUR HUSBAND SEX REGULARLY:* You are a career woman; You are an overly religious woman… Hmmm! You feel sex in marriage is secondary, you deny your husband your body regularly, so he is sexually starved and intimacy famished. His Secretary, colleagues, and girls in the church are seducing and begging him to come to them but you have padlocked your Jerusalem and expect him not to lust after others. His mind will drift from you towards them.

5) *LEAVING YOUR HUSBAND FOR YOUR FEMALE FRIEND TO CATER FOR:* 

“My dear friend, please be my eye as I travel for this one week, help cater for my husband and my little kids”. By the time you are back, your dear a friend has so really helped you by sleeping with your husband and expecting a new baby as a continuation from where you stopped.

If at all she has not eloped with your man, leaving your children all alone.

It is very stupid to commit your husband into the hands of your beautiful and very active friend.

6) *LEAVING YOUR HUSBAND IN THE HANDS OF YOUR HOUSEMAID:* Your maid is the one that cooks, cleans the house, cares for the children and your husband. You suddenly become a lazy bone since the arrival of the maid. All you do is shout and place orders. Not bad! But if your husband feels more love and care from the maid, sister that maid won’t struggle to snatch your husband. You are the one graciously giving him to her and those that need him.

7) *EMPLOYING A FULLY GROWN, RED-BLOODED LADY AS A MAID:* She is fully grown up and well endowed back and front very tantalizing. She dresses skimpily and sexily like an actress, catwalks like a model and that is your own housemaid?

What a mistake!

8) *EMPLOYING A HOUSE GIRL THAT IS MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN YOU:* Employing a house girl more beautiful than you is a major technical mistake most women make. This means you are using your money to employ a rival for yourself. Don’t be foolish when getting a maid. They act dumb like maids to you for the time being but when your husband starts sleeping with them, you will be shocked they are more agile than you when they start fighting you.

9) *USING ANALOG BRAIN TO LIVE WITH A DIGITAL HUSBAND:* Your husband is growing with ideas and all; you contribute nothing other than sitting down at home to eat. He is dressing like a guy with jeans and a face cap; you are celebrating the fact that you are a married woman to a Yuppy cute man. Your husband is on *Twitter, Facebook, Whatsapp, Skype, etc;* the only thing you know about a mobile phone is receiving and making calls. Your husband is talking about the stock market; you only talk about the tomato market. He’s talking about Forex; you are talking about fruit and vegetables only. He will see you so backward, local, and dumb. Upgrade please!

10) *FAILING TO COMMIT YOUR FAMILY INTO THE HANDS OF GOD:* A wife won’t do well if she fails to commit her family into the hands of God regularly. Don’t make such mistakes of thinking you are in charge of your husband and marriage and you can handle things. Be prayerful, hand over your family to God daily. May you never labor in vain and another reaps where you have sown!