Is that a relationship?

 WHAT IS A RELATIONSHIP

?

Many people do not know the meaning of relationship or read different meanings to that word.

A RELATIONSHIP is not about having a handsome boyfriend or having a beautiful girlfriend.

It’s not about looking for a perfect person because there isn’t any perfect person on earth.

It’s not about looking for a fair complexion or a rich person.

Having a lot of money doesn’t mean that one has too much pure love.

MONEY CAN’T BUY LOVE.

A relationship is about finding someone who respects you.

Who cares about you in anyway he/she can afford.

Who understands you.

Who is proud of having you.

Who appreciates you the way you are .

Who loves you the way you are.

Who is faithful to you.

Who knows how to comfort you.

Who is supportive to you or in everything you are trying to do.

Who knows how to encourage

you to be your best.

Who would accept the worst of you.

Forgive you

And who will go through everything without giving up on u.

Such people are very rare to find these days.

It takes God himself to bring you such person just like He did for Adam.

But your relationship with God will be a major determinant in finding such person.

If you have got such person already just keep that person.

Handle him or her with care.

Be honest & contented with that person and don't do anything to hurt or let down that special person.

Remember, Relationship is a full time commitment/sacrifice and you must be willing to pay.

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WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE GIVING UP ON YOUR MARRIAGE...

 WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE GIVING UP ON YOUR MARRIAGE...

1. REMEMBER THAT FEELINGS ARE NOT ALWAYS RIGHT...

Feelings can mislead you. People who cheat, who act in revenge, who flirt are misled by feelings. You feel like it at the time. Your feelings should be weighed on the scale of wisdom

2. REMEMBER THAT LOVE IS NOT A FEELING

Love is a commitment, a responsibility, a choice. Sometimes you will not feel all romantic or lovey dovey. Sometimes you will not be in the mood. Feelings vary but commitment is constant.

3. REMEMBER YOUR VOWS...

This will remind you why you got married.

4. LOOK AT THE INTIMATE PICTURES AND VIDEOS YOU HAVE TAKEN WITH YOUR SPOUSE"...

This will remind you how far you two have come. Sometimes those memories have to be revived especially when you lose your way.

5. PRAY...

You can mislead yourself. We are capable of making mistakes. Find out what God is saying. God will give you clarity.

6. KEEP AWAY NEGATIVITY...

Shield yourself from people who will encourage your confusion. Many people cheer up the collapse of love than they celebrate love. Be careful who you listen to when you're weak and vulnerable. We make the most mistakes when we let down our guard.

7. LIST DOWN WHY YOU LOVE YOUR SPOUSE...

It is human nature to tend to focus on the negative that we fail to remember the good. Look at your spouse in a balanced way and you will see the reasons why you love and married him/her.

8. ANALYSE YOUR PAST RECORD...

Look at your history. Perhaps you have a tendency of giving up too easily, of being impatient. Could it be the same cycle repeating itself of you being a quitter? If so, end the cycle.

9. REMEMBER THAT NO LOVE IS PERFECT...

Every love has it's challenges: Whether it's to do with finances, health, communication, in-laws, work, parenthood, misunderstandings or matters of sex. Challenges will be there to test your love and if you pull through the challenges together, your love will be stronger. Love is saying "I am with you no matter what".

10. CHECK YOUR EXPECTATIONS...

Are you expecting too much too soon? Some things couples grow into.

11. GO OUT ON A DATE...

Decide to make a new memory. If you two dwell on the dullness in your marriage, you will find being together draining. Snap out of the thought of separating, brighten up your love. Go out and have fun. Make love. Flirt. Don't make love complicated. The simpler you make it, the sweeter the love

12. WATCH MOVIES ON LOVE OR READ LOVE STORIES...

This will remind you of what love is about and that love overcomes obstacles. Believe in love again.

13. LISTEN TO YOUR SONG...

If you two have a special song that reminds you of the highest moments of your love, listen to it some more.

14. WORK ON YOUR MARRIAGE...

Whatever thing you feel needs to be improved in your marriage, progressively work on it. Make it work as a team. Perhaps what you are feeling is frustration or exhaustion. It is OK to be frustrated and exhausted, but not to be a quitter.

Marriage does not work by chance;

 It’s Hard to Fake Marriage… for Long!

When a woman has a good husband, it’s written all over her face. A letter from the heart can be read on the face. There are men who never hang out with their wives. I can do without a morning cup of coffee, but not without cuddling my wife. To woo a woman to be your wife is an art, to create a fulfilling marriage with her require maturity.

There’s an old wise African saying, “He who loves, love you with your dirt.” Mature men don’t hunt for younger girls after their wife’s breasts sag for breastfeeding their children. Your love for her should be like the misty rain, coming softly but flooding the river.

In ancient Egypt they warned girls, “If you marry a monkey for its wealth, the money goes and the monkey remains.”

Many are the roads that do not lead to the heart. When a marriage is working, the man longs to go home from work. The woman is excited to see him back. The kids are sad when daddy leaves. He who loves a thing often talks of it. How often does he brag about you? If she calls you brother or by your name, you’re probably no more than her business partner. How have you saved him in your phone?

If you notice a woman who never talks when the husband is around, the man is a bully no matter his public relations prowess. Free souls freely express.

As often said, peace is not the absence of war. Absence of verbal and physical conflicts in marriage is not synonymous to marriage stability. Most relational conflicts are emotional – deep rooted wounds that eventually explode. But you don’t need to act in your marriage. You don’t need to fake it till you make it. You can live a life of peace, joy, respect and love, EVERY DAY. All good will be attacked. The surest defense in your marriage is investing in your marriage. Marriage does not work; marriage is caused to work.

Marriage does not work by chance; marriage works by change... Changing from assumptions and retrogressive attitude and behavior, and embracing love, honor and growth.

NOW IS THE TIME TO BUILD A HOUSE FOR THE LORD

 hursday of the Twenty-Fifth Week of Ordinary Time 1 (28 Sept. 2023)

📖Haggai 1:1-8; Ps 149:1-2, 3-4, 5-6a and 9bc (R.v.4a); Luke 9:7-9

🎤NOW IS THE TIME TO BUILD A HOUSE FOR THE LORD 

After Ezra had settled the people in their land, things were so difficult for them, and so, they put off the reconstruction of the temple first while they went on rebuilding their own homes. Some of the leaders who should have cautioned them instead supported them with the normal excuse, "God will understand." It was at this time that God sent the prophet Haggai to the people.

The major message Haggai gave the people was on the immediate rebuilding of the temple of God. This temple was damaged when the people were taken to exile.

While we can historically place the ministry of Haggai in the post-exilic era of the Jews, we can say that he is talking to us too. First is on the need to support, in every way we can, in the building of the Church of God, both the material structure and the spiritual one.

Second, remember that our body is equally the temple of the Holy Spirit. Sin sends us into exile from the presence of God and destroys his temple in us. We must equally begin to rebuild this temple, and now is the time. Tomorrow may be too late.

Consider the insecurity that Herod felt at hearing about the works of Jesus. He had a strong material house, but he was still insecure because he had not built a home for God in his life. So shall it be for those who do not have a good place for God in their lives before the end.

May God help us to understand at all times the urgency of preparing well for the coming of the Lord before it is too late. Amen.

Do have a grace-filled day. Peace be with you.

HOW TO WIN AS A COUPLE

 HOW TO WIN AS A COUPLE

1. Cover each other's weaknesses

2. Celebrate each other's strengths

3. Have no topics that you cannot talk about. No judgment. Openness will open your mind to solutions

4. Consider each other's opinions and contribution

5. Be 100% in. Full commitment

6. Make incremental progress. Seek growth, not perfection

7. Develop a culture of reviewing your relationship; are we doing OK, and where can we improve?

8. Accept correction, be humble

9. Work on yourselves to be the best wife, the best husband

10. Have joint goals

11. Support each other in your individual goals

12. Keep each other as a priority even as you have friends

13. Thank God together. A thankful couple is a powerful couple

14. Don't compete with each other, accommodate each other

15. Bring whatever lessons or opportunities you learn out there into your marriage. Learn together

16. Be patient. Some wins take time

17. When you fall whether as a couple or as individuals, pick each other up

18. Protect what you have built together. It is very easy to lose it fast

19. Control your tempers. A lot of bad choices are made in moments of anger

20. Don't copy other couples. Create your testimonies.

Forgive yourself

Forgive yourself for everything

You did to survive

Sometimes it takes all you've got

Just to stay alive

Not everyone will understand

Sometimes not even you

The strength it takes just to stand

And keep on fighting through

It isn't quantifiable

No two survivors are alike

And no one knows just what it takes

To find stars in the night

When everything is just too dark

And you relive it all again

Take a breath and remind yourself

You made it in the end

I might not know your story

But I have one of my own

And I know it's not easy

To forgive yourself for coming home

But I promise you it's worth it

It's something only you can do

Remember, you did more than stand

You found a way to make it through.

~Mandy Kocsis©2022~