Thursday 28 September 2023

Why shouldn't we judge people based on where they are in life?

 

Our timeline of life is different for each person. Even different people reach the same destination at different times.
When someone takes more time to achieve what others have already achieved, other people often consider him a failure in his life. We have to remember that our journeys are not the same. Availability of resources, support networks, environments, and difficulties vary, so it is meaningless to have one timeline for everyone.
Never judge people if their progress is slow. Rather, support them and share your experience so that you can reduce some of the difficulties in their journey.

Is there beauty in our natural imperfections?

 

Imperfections are present in every person. Some can be seen, and some are not visible to our eyes. Once we understand this, we accept our uniqueness, feel confident and beautiful.
Our society has set beauty standards so those who don’t fit feel left out or low in self-esteem. The truth is that the biggest flaw is in the thinking that beauty can be measured. Beauty is not just external looks but the qualities a person possesses, most of which must be felt and understood.
Don’t be led by any ideas that make you feel inferior. Improve yourself in every possible way, but what cannot be changed, accept it with confidence, love yourself for who you are and change those made up ideas that some profit from.
Dr Bhawna Gautam

When she knew one thing about him

When she knew one thing about him, it was that he was not just a strong man,

But perhaps the strongest man she’d ever known.
She saw past the tough exterior and rugged facade..she saw a beautiful and vulnerable soul that longed for expression.
He’d been told all his life that men had to be hard, be tough and that vulnerability was a weakness.
Looking at him lovingly, she took his hand in hers and found his eyes with hers.
Her voice, very soft and soothing, seemed to be the one thing that could melt his defenses.
“My dearest man, you are the strongest person I’ve ever met but...there is another way.”
His eyebrows furrowed as he looked at her, perplexed and curious.
She smiled warmly.
“I see you..even the parts you hide from everyone else. I know there’s a side of you that longs to be free. A gentler, more vulnerable part of your soul. In fact, that’s the part of you that’s most beautiful of all.”
She could tell he knew her words rang true, but that he’d never had the chance to fully embrace all of himself.
He was known for his strength, his courage and his ability to overcome anything.
But for all his ferocity, he’d never found someone to love him for everything he was..and all that he wanted to be.
Pressing her forehead softly to his, eyes fluttering, she kissed him gently and saw the battle raging in his eyes.
Her voice, barely a whisper, soothed his fiery debate.
“My love, the strongest of us aren’t those who live and die by the sword, but those who are able to be the beautiful balance of strong and sensitive.
You don’t have to sacrifice anything about who you are to become who you’re meant to be..except to realize your happiness is more important than anyone else’s perception.”
Tears steamed down his face as she wiped them lovingly away with her warmest smile.
She had found a survivor and seen what none of the others ever glimpsed in his soul.
She loved him for not just who he was, but everything she knew he wanted to be.
Unconditionally without judgement, she was his safe place in a harsh world.
He could finally become the man he’d always tucked away, hiding and hopeful that one day, he could embrace who he truly was, instead of what he had always been told he should be.
On that fateful winter day, he discovered the love he’d waited his entire life to find in her.
In all his travels, for all that he had done and seen, she was the one thing he’d never experienced: true love.
For all the places he’d seen, there was nothing that would ever compare to what he found in her heart, in her arms.
Home.

Is that a relationship?

 WHAT IS A RELATIONSHIP

?
Many people do not know the meaning of relationship or read different meanings to that word.
A RELATIONSHIP is not about having a handsome boyfriend or having a beautiful girlfriend.
It’s not about looking for a perfect person because there isn’t any perfect person on earth.
It’s not about looking for a fair complexion or a rich person.
Having a lot of money doesn’t mean that one has too much pure love.
MONEY πŸ’° CAN’T BUY LOVE. 😍
A relationship is about finding someone who respects you.
Who cares about you in anyway he/she can afford.
Who understands you.
Who is proud of having you.
Who appreciates you the way you are .
Who loves you the way you are.
Who is faithful to you.
Who knows how to comfort you.
Who is supportive to you or in everything you are trying to do.
Who knows how to encourage
you to be your best.
Who would accept the worst of you.
Forgive you
And who will go through everything without giving up on u.
Such people are very rare to find these days.
It takes God himself to bring you such person just like He did for Adam.
But your relationship with God will be a major determinant in finding such person.
If you have got such person already just keep that person.
Handle him or her with care.
Be honest & contented with that person and don't do anything to hurt or let down that special person.
Remember, Relationship is a full time commitment/sacrifice and you must be willing to pay.

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WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE GIVING UP ON YOUR MARRIAGE...

 WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE GIVING UP ON YOUR MARRIAGE...

✍🏾
1. REMEMBER THAT FEELINGS ARE NOT ALWAYS RIGHT...
Feelings can mislead you. People who cheat, who act in revenge, who flirt are misled by feelings. You feel like it at the time. Your feelings should be weighed on the scale of wisdom
2. REMEMBER THAT LOVE IS NOT A FEELING
Love is a commitment, a responsibility, a choice. Sometimes you will not feel all romantic or lovey dovey. Sometimes you will not be in the mood. Feelings vary but commitment is constant.
3. REMEMBER YOUR VOWS...
This will remind you why you got married.
4. LOOK AT THE INTIMATE PICTURES AND VIDEOS YOU HAVE TAKEN WITH YOUR SPOUSE"...
This will remind you how far you two have come. Sometimes those memories have to be revived especially when you lose your way.
5. PRAY...
You can mislead yourself. We are capable of making mistakes. Find out what God is saying. God will give you clarity.
6. KEEP AWAY NEGATIVITY...
Shield yourself from people who will encourage your confusion. Many people cheer up the collapse of love than they celebrate love. Be careful who you listen to when you're weak and vulnerable. We make the most mistakes when we let down our guard.
7. LIST DOWN WHY YOU LOVE YOUR SPOUSE...
It is human nature to tend to focus on the negative that we fail to remember the good. Look at your spouse in a balanced way and you will see the reasons why you love and married him/her.
8. ANALYSE YOUR PAST RECORD...
Look at your history. Perhaps you have a tendency of giving up too easily, of being impatient. Could it be the same cycle repeating itself of you being a quitter? If so, end the cycle.
9. REMEMBER THAT NO LOVE IS PERFECT...
Every love has it's challenges: Whether it's to do with finances, health, communication, in-laws, work, parenthood, misunderstandings or matters of sex. Challenges will be there to test your love and if you pull through the challenges together, your love will be stronger. Love is saying "I am with you no matter what".
10. CHECK YOUR EXPECTATIONS...
Are you expecting too much too soon? Some things couples grow into.
11. GO OUT ON A DATE...
Decide to make a new memory. If you two dwell on the dullness in your marriage, you will find being together draining. Snap out of the thought of separating, brighten up your love. Go out and have fun. Make love. Flirt. Don't make love complicated. The simpler you make it, the sweeter the love
12. WATCH MOVIES ON LOVE OR READ LOVE STORIES...
This will remind you of what love is about and that love overcomes obstacles. Believe in love again.
13. LISTEN TO YOUR SONG...
If you two have a special song that reminds you of the highest moments of your love, listen to it some more.
14. WORK ON YOUR MARRIAGE...
Whatever thing you feel needs to be improved in your marriage, progressively work on it. Make it work as a team. Perhaps what you are feeling is frustration or exhaustion. It is OK to be frustrated and exhausted, but not to be a quitter.

Marriage does not work by chance;

 It’s Hard to Fake Marriage… for Long!

When a woman has a good husband, it’s written all over her face. A letter from the heart can be read on the face. There are men who never hang out with their wives. I can do without a morning cup of coffee, but not without cuddling my wife. To woo a woman to be your wife is an art, to create a fulfilling marriage with her require maturity.
There’s an old wise African saying, “He who loves, love you with your dirt.” Mature men don’t hunt for younger girls after their wife’s breasts sag for breastfeeding their children. Your love for her should be like the misty rain, coming softly but flooding the river.
In ancient Egypt they warned girls, “If you marry a monkey for its wealth, the money goes and the monkey remains.”
Many are the roads that do not lead to the heart. When a marriage is working, the man longs to go home from work. The woman is excited to see him back. The kids are sad when daddy leaves. He who loves a thing often talks of it. How often does he brag about you? If she calls you brother or by your name, you’re probably no more than her business partner. How have you saved him in your phone?
If you notice a woman who never talks when the husband is around, the man is a bully no matter his public relations prowess. Free souls freely express.
As often said, peace is not the absence of war. Absence of verbal and physical conflicts in marriage is not synonymous to marriage stability. Most relational conflicts are emotional – deep rooted wounds that eventually explode. But you don’t need to act in your marriage. You don’t need to fake it till you make it. You can live a life of peace, joy, respect and love, EVERY DAY. All good will be attacked. The surest defense in your marriage is investing in your marriage. Marriage does not work; marriage is caused to work.

Marriage does not work by chance; marriage works by change... Changing from assumptions and retrogressive attitude and behavior, and embracing love, honor and growth.