HOW TO TALK TO YOUR MAN ABOUT A SENSITIVE ISSUE

We sometimes complain that the men don't want to talk or listen. Here's some things that could help..

WATCH YOUR TONE

When upset or frustrated, your tone could easily become sharp, harsh, condescending and full of coldness. A man doesn't like engaging anyone with such a tone. Approach him with peace and the issue will be resolved in peace

TIMING

Straight after work is not the time for a deep talk. One is mentally and physically tired. Let him relax first, put his feet up and approach the subject at a good time

WATCH YOUR EYES

Men get repelled by condescending and mean eyes. I'm sure you would too 

DON'T ENGAGE HIM WHEN HE IS DRUNK

If your man is they type that gets intoxicated, don't bother yourself to talk serious issues. Wait till he is sober to have a meaningful talk

DON'T CONFRONT HIM IN FRONT OF YOUR CHILD(REN)

Infront of the kids be cordial, smile, show unity and when it's just you and him, then talk about the issue

DON'T ACCUSE HIM FALSELY

Some women do this. However, this is the easiest way to make him feel attacked and to break the delicate fabric of trust between you two. Before you jump into conclusions, ask him questions politely. Talk with facts. Don't interrogate, politely ask.

 DON'T CAUSE A SCENE

A man loses respect for a woman who causes a scene in public or in front of family or friends

SOOTHE  HIM

If you want to introduce a topic that has been bothering you, hold on to it. Prepare him his favourite meal, do things that make him feel good. While he is in a good mood, lovingly introduce the issue for discussion

 BE IN CONTROL OF YOUR EMOTIONS

If the issue is heavy, be prepared for a conversation that will be heavy on your heart but remain calm and collected. Being frantic and delirious will not aid your cause.

 NO INSULTS

Watch your tongue. Keep calm. Insulting him or parading his weaknesses and past mistakes will complicate things. You need him to know you are on the same team

THE 28 LAWS OF LOVE:

1. If you want to be hugged; keep foul smells off, take showers, wear nice perfumes or colognes

2. If you want to be trusted; keep secrets shared with you, don't judge

3. If you want to be sexed by your spouse; stay sexy and faithful

4. If you want to be listened to; talk

5. If you want to be talked to; listen

6. If you want to be easily and quickly forgiven; apologize

7. If you want to be thought of; be memorable

8. If you want to be known; open up

9. If you want to be kissed; maintain good dental hygiene, moistured lips.

10. If you want to be fought for; be valuable, be someone worth fighting for

11. If you want your phone to be called; give out your phone number

12. If you want to be taken out for dates; make time, be available

13. If you want a love blessed by God; do it God's way, choose someone Godly

14. If you want freedom; be responsible

15. If you want to be believed; don't tell lies

16. If you want to be admired; be of great character

17. If you want to be chosen and made special; stand out

18. If you want someone to be strong for you; show your weakness

19. If you want to be helped; share your issues and problems

20. If you want to be supported; disclose your dreams and ambitions

21. If you want someone to walk with you; make room for them in your life

22. If you don't want to be lonely; be social, learn to relate

23. If you want a good spouse; have the qualities you desire in a spouse

24. If you want real love; be real, be yourself

25. If you want to grow; be willing to learn and be open to correction

26. If you want to be married to; act like someone ready for marriage and a serious commitment

27. If you want to experience the depth of love; give it your all

28. If you want love; take risks, trust someone with your heart

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THE ART OF SPEAKING TO YOUR MAN

1. Avoid talking tough to him. Don't make him feel you are out to compete with him

2. Don't speak harsh at him and justify you do so because you are angry. In your anger, do not damage

3. Give him room and time to talk. Don't dominate the conversations. Dialogue, not monologue

4. Be consistent. Don't be the woman who speaks great things to him and the same who insults him. Your insults will cancel all the good you have spoken to him in the past

5. Check your tone. You might be saying the right thing but with the wrong tone. Sometimes your message is not well received because of your delivery

6. Don't give silent treatment, it pushes him away 

7. Don't make demands or give instructions as if you are his boss, he will switch off. 

8. Maintain warmth in your conversations, it makes him stay in the talk

9. Talk with him things that stimulate his mind, that makes him learn; it makes him excited to talk to you. Mature talk, not drama

10. Never make a conversation be about praising another man whilst demeaning him; be it your ex, your father, your pastor, a celebrity or friend

©️ Akello Oliech and Dayan Masinde

YOUR NA*KEDNESS IS YOUR HUSBAND'S CROWN💍💞

 

Never fail to understand that your na*kedness is your husband's crown. Once another man sees your nakedness, that means your husband's crown has been taken off 

 

As a married woman, some men won't stop admiring you even when they fully know you're a married woman. 

When a man starts calling you unnecessarily or say outrageous words to you try and stop him. 

 

As a married woman, be wise not to be carried away, when a lot of men toast you, calls you a beautiful bride, they do all that because of your husband's crown  on your head. Once you take it off or they succeed to take it off, you will come to understand it was all an illusion. 

 

Set boundaries and stop entertaining pet names from another man. 

Stop unnecessary conversation from opposite s*x in your inbox and warn them seriously. 

Stop begging people to give you data/airtime, it is the simplest way you can avoid disrespect from young guys who are looking for people's wife to sleep with.

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15 THINGS YOU SHOULD NOT BELIEVE ABOUT YOUR WIFE:

Hello sir, I want to tell you things you must not believe about your wife. Read it sir 👇👇👇.   

1. Don't believe that your wife is a mistake in your life  

2. Don't believe that you can go far in life by neglecting your wife  

3. Don't believe that you can cheat on your wife & go scot-free. 

4. Don't believe that you did your wife a favour by marrying her.  

5. Don't believe that s*x with your wife will destroy your anointing.  

6. Dont believe that s*x with another woman is better than s*x with your wife.  

7. Don't believe that your wife is your slave.  

8. Don't believe that your wife's opinion does not count in your life and your family success.  

9. Don't believe that your wife knows nothing. 

 

10.Don't believe that there is something in the body of another woman that is not in the body of your wife except you are looking for your early grave.  

11. Don't believe your wife has all it takes to raise your children alone.  

13. Don't believe that the best way to correct your wife is to beat her.  

14. Don't believe that your wife is so strong that she does not need your help, attention and affection.   

15. Don't believe that God is not aware of how you are treating your wife.   

True love is a beautiful thing 💕💞💓♥️

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*WHAT IS TRUE LOVE?*

Years ago,  when I lived in *Lugbe,* a suburb in *Abuja,* a number of girls lived in a building adjacent to me. They strictly lived to be picked up by men.  

The girls will *go out at night* and return the following *morning.*  I, and other neighbors were *angry.*  The girls were very noisy.  They never cared who their noise disturbed.

One day, the landlord had enough. *He evicted all of them.* Their properties were thrown out. All the girls found somewhere else to relocate, *except one.* She had no place to go.

She kept her belongings in our building corridor, and on nights that she was home, she'd sleep there... *and that was on most nights.*

The tenants in the building, *including my husband and I,* met to plan how to put her and her belongings out. *Surprisingly,* one tenant, *a woman* was against the idea. She asked, "What would you all do if this girl was *your daughter, sister or relative?"* She told us that this girl and her friends have, no doubt made *wrong choices.* But she reminded us that we too, *at some point* in our past also made wrong  choices. But God still held us close to His heart and saved us.  She cautioned us as Christians to *consider what Christ Jesus would do.*

Everyone was quiet. But none suggested any way to help the *now homeless* lady. 

Later on, the same woman who defended her at the tenant meeting had a talk with her husband. They agreed to house the girl *in their moderate apartment.*

They invited the girl into their home and told her she could stay with them. The homeless girl was shocked when the woman said to her, *"We know what you do for a living.* And you are free to go out at night and come back the next day if that's what you choose to do. Feel free to eat our food. Use the other bedroom. It is yours *as long as you live here.* Live like one of us. We did not bring you in to judge you. _But we will continue to pray for you._ Hopefully, the spirit will talk to you..., *at your own time."* 

_The girl was dumbfounded._ And she cried. At nights, *she stayed home.* Going out to look for men gradually became a thing of her past. 

She would join the family for morning devotion *and go to church with them on Sundays.*

One day, the woman, *now her landlord of sorts* told her of her husband's decision to pay for her to register in a university. The lady gained admission into a university. *She graduated on top of her class* and got a good job.  But even before she graduated, with a university grant for outstanding students, *she had started a business* of her own. 

Today, when you enter her office, she has this woman and her husband's photo on the wall behind her desk. The photo has the inscription, _*" 'My parents,' the only Christians I know''.*_

*Folks, what is true love?*

Many Christians cannot answer to this question.

*We resist the true essence of love but gossip around the house.*

The truth is, "Christ Jesus died for us.'' Why would a righteous man die for sinners?

That's what love is.

What can you do for someone even against your intrinsic instincts?

Every one we have chosen not to forgive, deserve forgiveness. That is the sacrifice that a Christian, who shows true love makes. 

*Love is not the practice of loving beautiful people. True love is shown by being willing to truly love those that many look down upon.*

_*How many less fortunate people have you taken home from church after service to feed?*_

_*Why do we feed the rich, and don't feed the needy?*_

Why do we scorn people who look like prostitutes? We look at children who look unkept and we shake our heads in disapproval, warning our children to avoid such people.

But what kind of people do we think that heaven is waiting up there for? 

Let's not lose the purpose of life because of what we have almost achieved.

Can someone say of you, *"I met a true believer in you?"* 

Think about it.

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