HOW TO APOLOGISE TO YOUR SPOUSE...✍🏾

HOW TO APOLOGISE TO YOUR SPOUSE...✍🏾

1. Don't justify why you did wrong. Accept it was wrong.

2. Don't seduce your spouse into sex hoping that sex will make your spouse forget the wrong you did and you can escape humbling yourself to say sorry.

3. Don't blame your spouse for making you do something wrong. Be an adult. Take responsibility for your actions.

4. Don't send friends, family, or siblings to apologize on your behalf. It shows cowardice. Face the one you have wronged.

5. Don't belittle the wrong you did as if showing your spouse he/she is overreacting. If it is a big deal to your spouse, take it as a big deal.

6. Don't start listing your spouse's past wrongs when your spouse confronts you on your current wrong. Love doesn't keep a record of wrongs.

7. Don't apologise on social media or put a post on Facebook or WhatsApp status hoping your spouse will see it without saying anything in private. Make your apology personal and heartfelt.

8. Don't brush it off and move on as if nothing happened just because you know your spouse loves you. Don't sweep things under the carpet.

9. Don't throw money and gifts at your spouse and do good deeds without addressing the hurt you have caused and the issue. You can't buy your way into healing. Healing is emotional, not material.

10. Don't apologize rudely and casually saying "Aah,  OK then, I am sorry then if that will make you stop complaining" just because your spouse has asked for an apology. Show genuine remorse. 

11. Don't wait for when your spouse has decided to divorce you or to break up with you to let go of your ego and say sorry. You might be too late.

12. Apologise as soon as possible, sincerely, acknowledging your fault, recognizing how it hurts your spouse, and assuring him/her of your love and commitment to do better.

©Joy's Pen

#ShekinahGloryTV

5 Lessons ALL MEN Should Take from Kaka’s MARRIAGE

5 Lessons ALL MEN Should Take from Kaka’s MARRIAGE

Kaka is a Brazilian Footballer and a Real Madrid star who was married for 10years. 

1. He got married to his childhood sweetheart in 2005 and got divorced in 2015. Some people are in relationships or marriage today and are still stucked in their past and always thinking they are missing something and maybe their love life would have been happily ever after if only they married their first love or childhood sweetheart 

2. The ex wife was a stunning model married to a superstar. Marrying the most beautiful woman or a rich man will not spear you from eating breakfast 

The Ex wife as revealed the reason he divorced Kaka. She said:

“I was not happy but felt something was missing, Kaka betray£d me, he treated me well, he gave me a wonderful family but I wasn’t happy, something was missing”

What was missing? He was not a bahdt boy, he was too perfect for me. She said

Now there’s a popular saying that good men finish last. And the issue is that both the women and the good men would not agree but the badddt guys knows it’s true. 

Majority of women are attracted to bahdt boiz

There a reason Burna Boy ranked one of the most sexi£st men on earth, it’s not because he’s cuter than Wizkid but he has this bahdt boy look

Being a Bahdt boy is not about mishandling the ladies or being mean to them. 

3. It’s in the way you dress, most women are attracted to certain kind of appearance. In the US, you need a rough curl or dread lock. Find what works in your area

4. The way you communicate. Some of y’all are too predictable. You should know when to go hard and be soft in the same breath. Don’t let them twist you,  women don’t like soft men. I have never seen any soft man who has a happy home. The only exception are those who have surrendered their leadership to the wife. They have become the wife and the wife became the husband.

And finally, being a good man for most women means, someone they can easily control and twist. 

Don’t get it twisted, being soft is not a virtue but a quality to have on the side to strike the balance as required for the relationship to thrive

My name is Dayo Aderinto

🎤"LORD JESUS, RECEIVE MY SPIRIT" (Acts 7:59)

⏰Tuesday of the Third Week of Easter (16 April 2024)

📖Acts 7:51 - 8:1a; Ps 31:3bc-4, 6 and 7b-8a, 17 and 21ab (R.v.6a); John 6:30-35

🎤"LORD JESUS, RECEIVE MY SPIRIT" (Acts 7:59)

Can you be brave enough to also make that last option for God? Remember always that heaven is our goal. All our struggles and way of life must be directed toward helping us to achieve that goal. Otherwise, we shall be running off the track.

When Stephen was about to die, he cried out, "Lord Jesus, receive my spirit" (Acts 7:59). That kind of declaration can only be made by one who is not attached to the material goods of this world but rather has his/her heart focused on God.

Can you also make such a declaration as Stephen? You can begin now to practise it through the manner of life you live. It would be hard to deny the devil at the last hour if you spent your entire life working for him.

Moreover, such a declaration can only be made from a personal conviction about the person of Jesus. That is why Jesus advised the Jews to cease their chase after signs and wonders and believe in him, who is the source of life and all that it offers (cf. John 6:30-35).

May God continue to give you grace to remain convinced and faithful to him. May he surround you with his angels to guide you at your last hour in this world so that you can really make the last option for Christ. Amen.

Have a grace-filled day ahead. Peace be with you.

http://www.fadajbcezeonwumelu.com/lord-jesus-receive-my-spirit-acts-759/

Film makers

Those Names And Title Credit You See Before A Movie Starts, Do You Know What They Do? Ok Lets Break Them Down For Those Who Dont Know.

EXECUTIVE PRODUCER -This is the one sponsoring the movie. He/She provides the funds and financial backing to execute the project. EPs are usually investors looking to invest their money in a Movie.

PRODUCER -The Producer is the one who assembles the cast, crew, logistics etc  He/She is also responsible for paying for cast and crew services (using the funds provided by the Executive Producer) and making all necessary arrangements to make the movie successful. A producer sometimes is also the EP.

PRODUCTION MANAGER -This is one who assists the producer to manage the provisions being made by the Producer. The PM may also keep financial records and works with the Producer to ensure the Movie stays within proposed Budget.

DIRECTOR -The one who directs the projects from start to finish. Ditecting is the most important part of the moviemaking. He/She takes the lead and directs actors and the rest of the crew to give the movie the desired result which the Producer have outlined.

ACTOR -Actor gets into the character that must be portrayed. He/She has to be very skilled else the movie is not interesting to watch.

STORY -The one who created the story

SCRIPT/SCREENPLAY - The one who pens the story into spoken words, scenes and montages. The scriptwriter must know how many words that make up a scene in order not to make the scenes too lengthy or too brief.

SCRIPT EDITOR- Reads through the script to correct any mistakes or blunders.

EDITOR -the ones who arranges the video clips from scene to scene in order of sequence to create the movie. 

SPECIAL EFFECTS -the one who creates the effects. Example when you see a human flying in the movie

DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGRAPHY -this person takes the video shoots. He selects what camera angles will suit each scene.

LOCATION MGR -This is the person who seek out locations for each scene. He must know the

HOW TO HANDLE SEXUAL ATTRACTION IN COURTSHIP...

HOW TO HANDLE SEXUAL ATTRACTION IN COURTSHIP...

Of course, I had high chemistry for my fiance in courtship! This thing called love can "shack", seize your brain and scatter your logic!

It felt so warm, so electric and so hot being in love with Dewunmi and I ran after him as much a he ran after me. He loved me, all of me. His smiles always melt my heart and his high level of self control was a sexual turn on on its own.

I wanted his hug badly but he wouldn't budge. 5 years was exciting without sex because we did more talking, facing our academics, passing in flying colours and working out our goals.

Then we graduated and we both had our jobs and he would visit me. My tall, slim, handsome virgin dude would always visit me. When I couldn't handle the crazy urge to merge anymore, we got married and sex has been passionate IN MARRIAGE with him. The fact that he waited till marriage and sleeps with only me gets me turned on for him easily.

Here is the point:

1. SEXUAL ATTRACTION IS NORMAL IN COURTSHIP: If it is God's will, you will have chemistry for each other. It is the erotic love needed to fulfill God's commandment of "Be fruitful and multiply" in marriage. Don't kill yourself with guilt because you often feel like kissing, hugging and having sex with her (as long as you don't do it, no need to hang yourself with condemnation). I was once single. I felt what you are feeling. That crazy urge is part of the total package called love.

2. SET BOUNDARIES: Setting boundaries will help you stay in check. No visitation beyond 7 o clock, no hugging, no kissing, no pecking, no nothing that will stir your hormones and make you lose your brain. You must stay sexually pure in courtship. Setting boundaries will help you a lot.

3. BE HONEST WITH EACH OTHER: Ovulation can sometimes jazz up your sexual desire making you lose control to something as simple as touch. Let him know the days you can't just see him talk less of touching. There are days as a man you know your libido is high, don't visit.

4. AVOID, FLIRTY, SEXY, MIDNIGHT CHATS: You will lose your sanity and get horny, the next time you see, you may land in bed and have sex with each other like crazy! Don't start what you can't finish and one day regret!

5. SET YOUR WEDDING DATE: If your sexual urge is getting unbearable, kindly set your wedding date and set yourself free. If you are still schooling, you might need to get a break from your courtship till you get your bearing and then resume.

Some singles might say, "What happens to self control?" Yes, you must have self control as a good born again Christian but courtship requires more than self control to keep your virginity/sexual purity. Setting boundaries is the key!

You can't be praying together on your bed on a cold rainy night and preach self control to each other. That is stupidity of the highest order! The bible says: "Can a man carry fire in his bossom and not be burnt?" Another passage says: "FLEE (run away) from all appearances of evil".

To keep your sanity in courtship, learn when to stay and when to run so you don't lose your sanity and come weeping you made a mistake.

May you not fall in Jesus' name.

Thanks for reading. See you next time. God bless you. Cheers!

© Seun Oladele, 2019; reposted,  2024

EVERY AFRICAN ARTWORK HAS A MESSAGE OR STORY TO TELL: MAZI MBONU OJIKE CONFIRMS THIS WITH EXAMPLES

EVERY AFRICAN ARTWORK HAS A MESSAGE OR STORY TO TELL:  MAZI MBONU OJIKE CONFIRMS THIS WITH EXAMPLES

Mazi Mbonu Ojike talking about African artists (carvers) and narrating his discussion with a carver in his hometown Arondizuogu said:

“And as he ((carver) explains the graphic meanings of his art, we perceive how ignorant we laymen are. He seeks to bring about a reform without a sword, without a word. His language is the language of ages, the philosophy of his society. He does nothing for personal gain; every symbol is designed to humble us, the selfish and the power-seekers. His logic of the order in creation is most bewildering.

A carver once picked up a calabash produced by another and asked, “What do you think these signs represent?” I had been eating from the vessel without the least curiosity to discern the meanings of the beautiful graphic forms on the cover. “I don’t know,” said I. “Please tell me.” He went on and brought a gun and ask me if I had ever seen a herd of beasts. I was frightened: I might be shot. “Yes,” said I. He showed me the forms representing the hunter, the gun, the animals; and gradually brought me to guess. “Oh,” I said, “it means that a hunter killed some squirrels.” “Wrong, but not much!” exclaimed he. The artistic meaning was that “if you discharge a big gun, the animas will flee”. I was so interested that I went and brought out the other half of the calabash and learned that there was a moral on it too.” 

"It depicted a struggle for existence where there were three levels of creation – the hen protecting her brood, the hawk trying to pounce upon the hen, and the hunter aiming at the hawk. The hunter shot down the hawk, and the hen, with her young, was spared. Asked the importance of “wasting” energy over so trivial an idea, the carver proceeded to tell me a story of how a big village went to war with a smaller one fifty years ago. The battle raged high and low until a bigger village attacked and over threw the aggressor. I said, “Yes, but what difference did it make? One village was defeated, anyhow, and all three belonged to the same town.” “You see, son,” he said, “the biggest saved the smallest, just as the hunter saved the chicken. The big village was the greedy aggressor, just like the hawk. Hence God, who does not sanction aggression, leaves one creature above the other, and another above that still, so that when one attacks the creature below, there is always another higher power to discipline it by force.” “Ihe kwulu, ihe akwudebe ya” – When a thing stands, another stands beside it.”

Culled from Mbonu Ojike, My Africa (London: Blandford Press, 1955), 167- 168.

………………………………………

When you see any ancient carving, think of the unassuming sculptor who laboured, gave his or her talents, time and energy to serve the people, including the generations yet unborn. Appreciate such works. Admire it. Try to decode the message hidden in it. It is for your good, your peace and progress. Do not think of burning it or throwing it away. Such acts of barbarism raise a big question mark on one’s educational and religious upbringing. 

Think about it as we commemorate World Art Day 2024.

Udo diri unu.

Fada Angelo Chidi Unegbu