Sunday, 21 April 2024

Sex, romance, and cuddling

Sex, romance, and cuddling are related but distinct aspects of human connection and intimacy. Here's a breakdown of each and their connections:

*Sex*:

- Physical intimacy and sexual activity
- Biological and physiological responses
- Can be driven by desire, attraction, and pleasure
- Can be a one-time encounter or a regular aspect of a relationship

*Romance*:

- Emotional connection and attachment
- Feelings of love, affection, and fondness
- Often involves gestures, surprises, and thoughtful actions
- Can be a short-term infatuation or a long-term commitment

*Cuddling*:

- Physical touch and affectionate contact
- Releases oxytocin, promoting feelings of warmth and bonding
- Can be intimate or platonic (e.g., hugging a friend)
- Can be a way to show affection, comfort, and support

Connections between them:

- Sex and romance often go hand-in-hand, as emotional connection can enhance sexual desire and pleasure.
- Cuddling can be a precursor to sex or a way to maintain intimacy outside of sexual activity.
- Romance can lead to cuddling and physical affection as a way to express love and affection.
- Sex and cuddling can release oxytocin, strengthening emotional bonds and attachment.

Remember, these aspects of human connection can blend together or exist independently, and their meanings and importance can vary across individuals and relationships.

Called to be a good sheep!

Called to be a good sheep! 

Today is good shepherd sunday or vocations prayer day. Those who work in the vineyard of God are reminded of their special  mission and call to be like Jesus the good shepherd. We are invited to reflect what it means to volunteer to serve God and his church. As parents, teachers, health workers, artisans etc we must look on Christ and discern how we ought to carry out our jobs as leaders. 

You must be aware of wolves, false teachers who mislead people with their speculations. Those who have turned the Gospel into mere rhetorics, comic relief moments and even proposing false theories of salvation. 

Jesus values you so much, little wonder he laid down his life for you. We must learn from him in discharging our responsibilities responsibly in whatever position we find ourselves. 

If Christ is the Good Shepherd, are you a good sheep? Do you love him as much as He loves you? Are you equally prepared to lay down your life for him and others? Can you listen and follow even when it is uncomfortable for us to do? Are you prepared to obey him in all circumstances of life. 

May you remain precious in his eyes Amen. 

Sonde oma๐Ÿ’ž

Good Shepherd/Vocation Sunday

Sunday April 21, 2024. 4th Sunday of Easter, Year B

๐ŸŒปGood Shepherd/Vocation Sunday

White: ⛪ ๐ŸŒป๐ŸŒผ ๐Ÿ“–๐Ÿ“ค ๐Ÿ‘‘ 

๐Ÿ“–1st Reading: Acts.4:8-12
 
Responsorial Psalm: Ps.118 ๐ŸŽบ๐ŸŽป๐ŸŽท๐ŸŽถ (R.v.1) The stone that the builders rejected has become the corner stone.

๐Ÿ“–2nd Reading: 1Jn.3:1-2

Alleluia! Alleluai!! 
Jn.10:14

 I am the good shepherd, says the Lord, & mine kw ow me. Alleluia! 

๐Ÿ“–Gospel: Jn.10:11-18

Theme: *A shepherd like no other!* 

๐ŸŽค Reflection: 

➕Filled with the Holy Spirit, Peter addressed the rulers of the people that if they were being examined because of the good done to a cripple & by what means it was done, that all the people should know it was in the name of Jesus of Nazareth they crucified. Jesus was a stone rejected by the  builders that turned into the corner stone. And salvation could only come through Him for there was no other name given among men under heaven that they would be saved except the name of Jesus.

➕Jesus clearly stated in the Gospel that He is the good Shepherd who lays down His life for His sheep. Hirelings take to their heels when they see a wolf & leave the sheep to their fate. The wolf snatches & scatters them. He knows His sheep & His own know Him just as Him & His Father know themselves. He said that He has other sheep that are not of the fold which He must lead for them to heed His voice so that there would be one flock & one Shepherd. His Father loves Him for He lays down His life for His sheep on His own accord. He has power to lay it down & to take it again. 

➕Beloved sheep of the Lord's pasture, shepherding is one of the world's oldest occupation that thrives in agricultural communities around the world. A shepherd is therefore a person who tends, feeds or guards a heed of sheep. He/she is ever committed to the welfare & survival of the flock entrusted to his/her care. While Peter stood boldly before the Sanhedrin to testify that the healing of the crippled was one of the life-saving missions of Jesus the Good Shepherd in the 1st Reading, Jesus declares Himself that true Shepherd who lays down His life for His sheep in the Gospel!

➕In delivery his homily on the Good Shepherd on May 3, 2020 at the peak of the Covid-19 pandemic in the Chapel of St Martha, Rome, Pope Francis while highlighting the meekness & tenderness of the Good Shepherd added a 3rd characteristic namely; sacrifice. He recounted the sacrifices of many pastors & medical personnel especially doctors & nurses many of whom died while caring for the covid-19 patients as good shepherds. He therefore charged everyone in every profession to wear his/her own garb of the good shepherd, & be ready to sacrifice for those placed under his/her care; for we all are shepherds of some sorts. Apparently, Jesus chooses today the image of a shepherd to drive home a very critical part of His earthly mission because so many shepherds of His time never lived up to the expectations of this life-staking occupation. While a hired shepherd leaves the sheep in moments of danger, a good shepherd shields them from wild animals & other predators.

➕To shepherd is a call to serve selflessly & to even risk one's life for the sake of the sheep. Unfortunately, what we have today in most spheres of our lives be they political, social, religious domestic etc., are mostly wolves in shepherd clothing who care nothing about the sheep, rather concentrate in milking, feeding fat & bleeding them to death. What plays out in our society today is simply an opposite or a satire of what a good shepherd should be. Most of us are guilty considering how we exercise authority in the various leadership positions we occupy. Obviously, whatever we are is not for ourselves; it is for others. It therefore becomes imperative that we commit ourselves caring & uplifting those under our watch through our profession & ministery.

➕Remembering the exemplary lifestyle of a Shepherd like no other, the Church calls us to imitate Him in Peter & John who feared nobody while defending the Person of the Good Shepherd in whose name the crippled healed. In an era whereby almost every hired or inspired shepherd called to serve goes with the ulterior motive of what to take out from the flock, She asks us: 1️⃣What is our interest; service to the people or self aggrandizement? 2️⃣Are we true shepherds in our families, communities, churches & government circles? 3️⃣Do we sacrifice for the sheep or oppress them mindlessly? 4️⃣Do they recognize our voice & do we listen to their concerns? & 5️⃣Do we lead them to greener pastures or devour them to satisfy our greed?

➕Let us learn from Jesus the sacrifice, love & gentility of a Shepherd in our various positions of leadership. We must support in feeding the sheep, & pray to God to raise true shepherds after His heart. We stand to be dispossessed of our flocks if we fail in our responsibilities! We pray also for increase in vocation both in religious & family lives, & for missionaries working in difficult missions. As shepherds therefore, let us watch over the flock entrusted to our care not for sordid money, but because we are eager to do it. May we never be a dictator over them, but an example for all of them to follow. Then when the Chief Shepherd appears, we will be given a crown of unfading glory (1Pt. 5:2-4). 

๐Ÿ™Let us pray: The Good Shepherd, lead us to greener pasture; do not allow us to be devoured by the beasts of the forest. Amen!
 
๐Ÿ™We pray for all shepherds, that they may be strengthened to work for the interest of the sheep. May the sheep hear their voice. Amen! 

๐Ÿ™๐ŸผWe also pray for increase in vocation to priestly, religious & family lives, may God raise from among His people men & women of character who will look after the flock well. Amen!

#️⃣DoNotGiveUp
#️⃣ContinueTheStruggle
#️⃣SanitizeINEC 
#️⃣ReformTheJudiciary 
#️⃣EndBadGovernance

๐Ÿ˜€Happy Good Shepherd Sunday! 

๐Ÿ™ŒHe will shepherd us as His flock!











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Saturday, 20 April 2024

THE COST OF A MARRIAGE

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Once upon a time, a certain village in Timbuktu was to have a celebration. The king ordered every man in the village to pour a keg of 'agwatashi', a local brew, into a big tank at the village square. 

One man sat in his house and thought to himself "If everyman pours agwatashi and I pour water, no one will know". He went and poured water. Coincidentally and unfortunately, his next door neighbor thought same way and did same thing. 

On the day of the celebration, when the drink was fetched from the tank for the king to taste, he discovered it was water. Every man in that village thought same way. 

Marriage is like an empty tank, it is empty and can only be filled with what the spouses pour into it. No spouse should expect to drink what he or she hasn't contributed. One person's contribution is not and will never be enough. 

It's like a bank account, if you open an account and don't fund it, you can't withdraw from it. You can't also withdraw more than you deposited. Husbands and wives must learn to deposit what they want to withdraw and enjoy, that's how costly marriage is. 

Above is the reflection I gave at the wedding in my little church today. It happened to be the first wedding I witnessed and officiated since I took charge of that lovely church. 

Beside the official stipend set by the Archdiocese(which is below 5k), this wedding cost this couple nothing. They had it during morning mass and after some snapshots they joyfully went home. Maybe they entertained some family and friends in their home, shikena. 

In appreciation for being the first wedding I've witnessed, and for their humility to cut their coats according to their material, I donated a bag of rice and 20k for their honeymoon. 

The cost of MARRIAGE is too much already, let's not make WEDDING costly . We can't cut the costs of MARRIAGE, but we can cut the cost of WEDDING.

The Hardest Part of Marriage You Won't Be Told

The Hardest Part of Marriage You Won't Be Told

Marriage is sweet when you examine it from a far, of those who have successful marriage or the lovey-dovey of newlyweds, but when you enter into, you will discover that what is behind number six is more than number seven. 

Many prepare so well for the romantic aspects of marriage, but very few groom themselves for the realities in marriage. Do you know that the hardest part of marriage plays a dominant role in marriage than the romantic moments?

However, what breaks marriage isn't the lack of romance, but the couple's inability to withstand the hardest part of marriage. 

There are some hard things about marriage that you are not likely to be told, but I will only share 5 of them with you.

1. Staying faithful

It's easy to abstain from sex as singles if you have not tasted how sweet sex is, but it's very difficult to stay faithful in marriage when you are denied sex for no just reason. 

The temptation to commit adultery is greater than the temptation to fornicate as singles. 

Because you now know how sex taste, seduction would come from those who are willing to give you or have a fling with you. In some cases, when your spouse becomes cold on sex matters, there are several others who want to give you a hot and sizzling sex. 

You need more discipline to stay faithful in marriage to your spouse emotionally, and sexually especially in this age when cheating has become a norm. 

If you have not been faithful to stay sexually pure now that you are single, it will be very difficult for you to master it when you are married. 

Marriage doesn't cure adultery, self control does! 

2. Sexual Issues

See, it is wise that you keep yourself sexually pure till marriage - purity in thoughts, action and word. All those who are deceiving you that who virginity epp only want to destroy you. 

One of the hardest part about marriage which many cannot come by is on the issue of sex. One partner is a novice while the other is an Emeritus professor in lovemaking; one has a high sexual libido while the other can stay for months without it and still feel sane. 

Virginity helps you to be sexually discipline, it prevents you from undue and ungodly exposure to sex that could either make you hate it with perfect hatred or make you a maniac in it. 

3. Money matters

Since it's said that money answers all things, money also destroys many things. As money can spice up love in marriages, it can also ruin it. 

What is your perception about money? 

Can you pull your purse together or separately? 

As a woman, do you have the warped mentality of my money is my money, but your money is our money? 

As a man, are you ready to work and earn a living or you want to live on your wife's income while dictating how the money will be spent without bringing anything to the table? 

Can you open up to your partner about your financial life without secretly building an estate in the village while you feed on his or her money like a parasite? 

Until you two resolve this before marriage and in marriage, it is hard enough to crack the nut of your marital bliss. 

4. Unmet expectations

If you have been dreaming of having her remain a slim shady, but eventually after pregnancy, she became a size 15, how would you cope? 

If he had been the romantic and available man, but after marriage, the quest for green pasture took him miles away, can you survive this? 

It is wise and better to prepare for the toughest part of marriage so that you can cope with them when they come, surely they will come. As much as you prepare for sunshine, don't forget to prepare for storms when they come before rain falls. 

5. Handling differences 

Whether you agree or not, handling differences is one of the leading causes of divorce in marriage. Many marriages fail due to irreconcilable differences. 

How do you plan to reconcile your differences in marriage should they come? 

If he presses the toothpaste from the middle, and she had been raised to be meticulous by pressing it neatly from the base, can you tolerate this? 

If she likes the food cold or warm, and you prefer it hot with steaming heat, can you adjust? 

These and many others are the toughest part of marriage that you must brace up for. Wedding is just a day or two event but marriage is a lifetime journey. 

More than the excitement of the married life, more than the grandeur wedding ceremony, have you been transformed by the renewing of your mind to face any challenge in marriage when they come? 

Delay in child bearing, loss of job, relocation, in law issues, financial crisis, trying times or spiritual issues may come; you need to be prepared for whichever one life throws at you so you don't chicken out when they come. 

Marriage is haaaard, I'm not scaring you; it's just one of those truths you might not likely be told or you don't want to hear. Finding the right person to marry is hard, but staying married is the hardest in the face of life's realities. 

As much as you are preparing for the romantic sides, brew your mind for the hardest part so you can stand having done all when the flood descend, when the rain falls and the wind beats upon your union.

This metal mร sk was used during sl@very for 3 main reasons:

This metal mร sk was used during sl@very for 3 main reasons:

1) To prevent the ensl@ved from eating fruits such as apples, pineapples, oranges, cashews, bananas, plantains and sugarcanes etc while harvesting them, yet they were made to wรฒrk consistently in all the plantation farms.

2) To stop the ensl@ved from chanting our African spiritual songs. Not only that those our spiritual and w@r songs affected the slร ve masters, it also motivated some ensl@ved to rรจbel and fรฌght back not minding l0sing their lives.

3) To stop ensl@ved form teaching our African local dialects (languages) to their children...whereby destr0yed our dialects, and forced them to learn foreign languages.

Last but not the least, to st@rve enslร ved as a punishment in the slร ve camps. The mร sk prevented them from eating or drinking. Sometimes the slร ve mร sters would f0rced an apple (a whole ๐ŸŽ) into the mouths of enslร ved before they wore the metal mask on them with the padlocks so that they c0uldn't talk.

๐Ÿ“ธ GettyImages