I was watching the last movie when I noticed him sit beside me on the floor, with two bottles of coke and a packet of crackers biscuit, which made me smile to myself, as I focused all my attention on the movie which was showing on his television……
“Mary here is cola oo he managed to joke while i smiled, and looked at him in appreciation. We ate the biscuit and drank the coke in silence, as i returned my focus back to the movie once again.
He later held my hand gently, which really made me look at him with surprise, and he appealed to me with his eyes.
“Please accept me into your life, i’m not a bad person, i promise and swear to keep your dignity and respect intact, i truly love you” he begged.
“Really?” i asked, while he held my hand strongly.
“I swear” he answered. I rolled my eyes and said nothing.
“Please answer me” he pleaded desperately.
Seriously seeing him beg me, really gladdened my heart, but i just pretended as if he was disturbing my peace.
“What do you want me to say again?” i asked, while he drew his face closer to mine.
“Please just say yes” he whispered. I looked into his eyes and saw love, desire and honesty in it, but i controlled myself and looked away.
“Just give me time, i will think about it”. I replied
But surprisingly and out of nowhere, he drew closer to me and gave me a tight hug, this i received while i closed my eyes ……
But I soon got myself and gently pushed him away, while he looked at me gratefully, and with shinning eyes.
“I have never felt this way before, thank you” he said, while i looked away and closed my eyes briefly, because i equally felt something strong when we hugged, which i have never felt for any guy before, not even my Ex..
I was unable to concentrate on the remaining part of the movie i was watching after the hug, because all my thoughts were now on him, and even though i was the one who pushed him away, i still wanted him to hug and hold me closer to himself, but then i had to control myself, because i’m nothing but an humble girl who has her pride and dignity to protect, and so i stood up minutes later, while he stared at me with his innocent face which always make me lose focus……..
“Let me go and sleep, i’m so tired” i said to him with a smile, while he equally stood up as well and held my hand.
“Will you come once you are through with your sleep?” he asked with a pleading face, while i looked down.
“I will try” I replied, but instead of letting me go, he drew closer to me, and hugged me again, while my soul melted. I immediately fled his room without looking back….
As i lay on my bed that evening, i battled with my thoughts and emotions, as i prayed for him to be real, because i really do not want to repeat the mistake i made with my Ex, who had equally looked so honest when i first met him, and so in love, i was with him then, that i freely gave him my virginity…….
Tears fell off my eyes as i remembered how he took my most precious asset, and i swallowed hard as i bit my lips. I knew i could never get over that trauma, because i knew the pain i passed through that fateful night. I thought he really loved me, just because he looked decent and said those words i wished to hear, I guess that’s one problem every girl faces, because we never really can tell or know the guy who really loves us. Moreover, they all appear good and decent at first sight, that you won’t really see the wolf in him, if you also do have feelings for him which will then blind you from his faults and before you know what, he’s had his way with you and it’s already too late………
My thoughts really drew much tears from my eyes that evening, and before i knew what was happening, i was already crying deeply, as my mind played back on how i lost my pride to Emmanuel……..
It’s really something that touched my soul, spirit and body, but i didn’t know it was just a game to him. Only God will judge us all and here is the story of how i lost my treasure……
No comments:
Post a Comment