Quick Lesson for ladies

I just want to teach some of the ladies out there a quick lesson.
It is no longer news that a lot of ladies move in with men that are not legally their husbands.
The guy promises them marriage and invites them to come to live with him. For some, it was just introduction. Aunty introduction is not marriage as long as he as not either put an official ring on that finger or paid your complete bride price depending on your tradition.

So, Aunty, you move in and start performing wife duties. You wash plate, sweep the house, wash his clothes, sleep with him on the same bed, have sex with him, some get pregnant, some abort while some keep the baby. You automatically turn baby mama.
Funny enough, uncle is not even saying a word about coming to see your parents, some times you ask him baba what's up and he tells you to relax that soon he will do something about it that you should try to understand.
Wait first, if uncle can take care of you while cohabiting with him, please what is preventing him from paying your bride price since he can take care of you and himself.

Uncle is busy enjoying wife privileges without paying your bride price. Aunty you too, you are busy enjoying husband privileges without any price paid on your head.
Few years down the line you are wondering why the marriage promised years ago is still just a promise and not yet a reality.
Sister listens very carefully.
Let me let you in on a secret about guys, once a guy starts getting from you everything he should get from his wife, he becomes lazy towards marrying you. He will keep putting other needs ahead of you. To him, what's the point of marring you legally when he is getting everything that a husband gets from his wife.
Aunty wife trainee, you need to understand that the distance you give a man and his desire to always have you around him is the force that will push and motivate him to do everything necessary to make you his wife. As long as you are always available the desire to put in the necessary action to tire you down to himself forever is lost.
You know yourself. As you are still reading this, start packing your bags and everything that belongs to you in his house. It's time to either go back to your parent's house or look for a female friend to stay with. I know you have been thinking about this, so now is time do make up your mind. Don't allow any man brainwash you that you no longer have value for yourself and the principal guiding your life.
Some of you will claim hardship as an excuse, aunty wife in training, let's be honest, you are not the only one in a difficult position. Many people have found themselves in a worse situation but didn't even consider the option of moving into the house of a man that is not legally their husband no matter what was promised. So receive sense now. Don't be lazy.
Living with him is not a guarantee that the uncle will end up marrying you. So many have tried and ended up shocked as to how uncle moved on to marry another sister that values herself.
If you move out and he is not rushing to pay your bride price to bring you back, then my sister you have wasted your life on a man that never wanted you.

MISSED CALL

I met a lady on Facebook early last week and we chatted for about three days before we agreed that I should visit her first. We both live in Lagos and the distance from my place to her house is not that far. So on the early hours of that day I called her and she told me the bus stop where I will alight and that I should call her when I gets there to direct me on how to get to her house, so I left my house well dressed and walked into a restaurant and bought some good foods and drinks for her because she asked me to bring something for her when coming, but on getting to the said bus stop I put a call to her, but lo and behold, her phone was switched off. I called and called for over an hour yet it wasn't connecting and out of anger I went back to my house and still kept calling, but it never went through so I had to delete her number from my phone. Later that day at about 6pm a call came in and I picked and she began to beg giving all sorts of excuses why her phone was off and asked me to give her my address let her come over and spend the night in my house but I refused because I don't know her plans. Please should I still continue with her or find my way?

Eating beans for ten years

A Man Cheating On His Wife Asked Me This Question After I Challenged Him Why He Cheated On His Wife.
SIR, CAN YOU EAT ONLY BEANS FOR TEN YEARS?
At first I didn't know how to answer him because it sounded as if he was making sense but God gave me an inspiration to answer him. Immediately, I replied: yes, I can. He laughed at me and looked at me with a question written on his face, how?

In reality I love beans so much and that makes me not get tired of eating it daily. But for me to continue to enjoy my beans I transform my beans into many things so I don't eat beans everyday and every time.

I can make beans cake (akara) for breakfast and momoi for lunch from the same beans. I can garnish my beans with varieties and spice it up with different spices.
I also asked him if he ever heard a scenario where a doctor advised his patient to avoid some set of food and stick to a particular or some particular ones? That is because those other food can damage his health or send him to his early grave.

Then he protested again, but sir, for a healthy living one needs to eat balanced diet. I became dumbfounded for a minute before another inspiration came. I realized that the Israelites ate only manna for forty years and no single one among them was sick for those forty years. Their sickness started when they requested for variety, "we need meat they said". God gave them enough meat, they ate and it was coming out of their noses.
When you eat what God is not happy with, it will come out of your nose. God is not happy with adultery.
He wanted to ask me further question but he paused and asked me to explain my previous answers. Then I explained thus;
Your spouse is the beans and if you truly love her you can never be tired of her. To transform my beans into akara and momoi means every man should spend on their wives to change their look as often as possible. Change her hairstyle weekly, change her wardrobe often, buy her what makes you attracted to other women outside.

Also, garnishing it with varieties and spicing it up with different spices require that you do some romantic things like using different styles at the bedroom, doing it elsewhere different from your home, making the place smell nice etc. Christian couples must be creative in their bedroom. Nudity and immodest dressing is not ideal outside but not in the the bedroom. Deliberately expose your cleavages and tigh for your husband, make your towel drop deliberately, bend down in front of him to pick it etc. Tempt him, seduce him and be his prostitute.
Your wife is a manna from heaven and she is a complete balanced diet. In her, there is protein, carbohydrate, fat, vitamin and minerals. That is why every woman has same contents. Though the container may differ in size and height. And like you know that the content of milk is what makes it milk and not the container, you use the milk and throw away the tin.
Don't take a bite from the forbidden fruit, it may look attractive but it is poisonous. Strange women may look attractive but they are poisonous and deadly, don't take a bite.
Thanks

THE SIZEABLE MARRIAGE SHOE

This is my opinion on marriage,
"Marriage is like shoe. When you wear oversize be ready to drag it along through out life, and when you marry under-size be ready to feel the pains through out life."
One thing about marriage is that you don't drop your shoe or remove it at any point no matter how painful or how stressful it is -
That is why I thought it necessary to write you this letter
Dear Singles,
When you are ready to buy your own shoe please take note of these three things:

1. Physical appearance:
Do not look for the beautiful once, the nice once or the cheap once. Look for the one that is your size.
Not every handsome, wealthy or intelligent guy is for you, not every beautiful woman is for you.
Look for the one that is meant for you, the once that aligns with your values and belief, the one who you meet at your life's journey.

It is important to know where you're going in life before you think of getting a wife.

2. Position:
All sizes of shoes are not placed in the same place. There is a place for cover shoes, rope shoes, canvers, snickers etc. We have Children sizes, young people's sizes and the adult size.
Know where to get your own shoe. Your size can not be everywhere my brother, your type cannot be everywhere my sister.
You cannot be a Christian, and be looking for a wife material at a club. Your wife or husband can't just be everywhere.

Stick to your values and therein you shall find someone like you, but when your values are not defined anyone can just match you.
Discover yourself and define your values

3. Perception:
In this kind of shoe purchasing enterprise, you are not permitted to try the shoe before you buy.
This is why it is important to seek guidance and counseling, from people who have bought shoes before or are into the business of directing people to the right shoes (Pastors,clerics and Relationship coaches)

And most importantly to avoid much time wasting time, simply consult the shoe manufacturer to tell you your size (God Almighty).

"You do not prepare for wedding, you prepare for marriage."
Ladies these days get so motivated when they attend wedding and they will quickly want to say yes to that guy.
Wait!!! It is not just the wedding Ooh, wedding is just one day. After the wedding. WHAT NEXT?

Finally, it is not something you rush to the market and just pick a shoes because you like or can purchase it.
Ask questions

-Where is this shoe made from? (Background)
-What's the size (Values)
-How much (His/Her interest)
-How long will it last (His/Her Character)
-Who made it? (Is she/He of the same faith This is compatibility)
-Will it match me? (This is whether he/she love you and will accept you the way you are)

Dear one. Remember, many are dragging their foot and they would hardly reach their destinies, many are feeling endless pains and wish they could pull off the shoes but no way!!!
I have seen people with beautiful shoes and when they show you their foot, you will see scars.
Beloved, it is not about the physical, it is the size, you can't know the size from afar so come close, build a relationship first but remember 'you are not permitted to try it before you buy it'
And for those who have purchased the wrong shoes, you can still make it your size again if you'd consult the manufacturer and let Him have His way in your marriage.
Your fulfillment is my priority

HOW A WOMAN CAN MAKE HER MAN LOVE LOVING HER

1. PRAY FOR HIM
No matter the level of a man's spirituality, prayer is respected and considered sacred. Pray for him, let him hear you pray for him

2. CHALLENGE HIM
Do greater things on your own, inspire him, expose him to greatness, make progress in your life that he feels he needs to pull up his socks. Don't just sit lazy. A man wants a woman who is hungry for her own personal growth. Challenging him doesn't mean looking down on him or asking why can't he be like other men?

3. NEED HIM
Men love feeling needed. Lovingly ask him for help, ask him for advice, "My love, what do you think I should do?". Involve him in your life and when he does help, thank him

4. CORRECT HIM
Men, love it when the woman tells him when he wrongs. The problem is many women don't know how to correct. Correct him with love, "Honey, don't you think it would have been better if..."; don't scold him like he is a little boy. Approach and tone is key. Don't attack

5. PRAISE HIM
The kind of compliments men love are, "You are such a good man", "You make a great dad", "Your mind is incredible", "You have a sexy body", "I love how you touch me", "My honey, I am proud of you". Praise him in private and in public. Don't be that woman who is quick to point out his flaws but rarely highlights what he does right

6. SEXUALLY MAKE ADVANCES
Many women think sex is to be left to the man, so they wait for the man to make advances. They become passive and shy during sex. Lady, your husband will love it sometimes if you are sexually aggressive, ask for his body, reach for his penis. Show him that you know he belongs to you. Make sex an adventure

7. SHOW INTEREST IN HIM
Ask him how his day is, his dreams, if he is OK. Most women want the man to show interest but they don't show interest back

8. TRUST HIM, DON'T MICROMANAGE HIM
Don't be overly possessives, demanding him to spend every second with you. Snooping his phone and doubting him when you find nothing, being suspicious of him, chocking his social life, . Be mature, if you push him away, he will keep things from you then things will get ugly. Most men keep things from their women, not because they are doing something wrong but because their women read too much into everything and pick up fights. This is dangerous. You are his Queen, wear your crown with confidence

9. COMPLAIN LESS
So many women don't even know they complain, they think they are simply expressing their right to speak and get things done properly. But men dislike a complaining woman, if he doesn't do things as you like, if he is not at your level; don't attack and nag. Just simply request him to do things a better way, but as you do so, appreciate the much he has done so far

10. GIVE HIM PEACE
This is what we all want when with a person. Peace. Peace at home. No fights, no frustrations, no stress. If your man is spending less time with you, perhaps you're not giving him peace. Men avoid complicated and draining environments. Lady, you complaining every day to him that he doesn't spend much time with you makes things worse. You think you are putting your point across but he feels pushed away. Attract him to you by giving him peace. Some men stay out there, not looking for a woman, but looking for peace

11. LOOK GOOD
Dress up, look sexy. Don't look good only when you are outside the home, look good also when it's just you two

12. TREAT HIM
Cater to him, cook for him, buy him gifts, treat him like a king, straighten his tie. These simple things mean alot to him, even if not every day, often

13. HAVE GOOD CONVERSATIONS
Men get attracted to good conversations. They want laughter, depth, intelligent conversations. They want to be listened to, to be wowed by a woman's mind. A woman who talks lovey dovey stuff but also about business, investments, social issues, a great vision; that woman is a keeper

14. EAT WITH HIM
Men love a good meal. Make it a habit to eat with him. Food brings people together

15. BE ADMIRABLE
Succeed in your personal life, do great things outside your marriage. Shine as a woman. Make him proud to say "That is my wife". Even the Proverbs 31 husband calls his wife "Blessed"

16. BE FRIENDLY TO HIS FRIENDS
Don't fight his friends. Find out who his friends are, get to have laughs and talks with them. Support his social life, be good to his family and siblings. If you have an issue with one of them, bring it to his attention without starting a war. Allow to also know your friends. When you both do this, it makes both of you secure

17. MAKE AN EFFORT TO UNDERSTAND WHAT HE LIKES
Find out what he likes and spend time with him once in a while doing that thing. If he loves rugby, watch matches with him sometimes; if he wins an award, go cheer him as he receives it; be his fan. You will not fail in marriage in Jesus name.

PITY FOR MY HUSBAND

From Miss Jamah's servant
I got married in 2008 and we have 4children together, but my problem is that my husband is not the bilogical father of my children and the whole thing is affecting me psychologically, each time I look at my husband.. I always feel pity for him.... My conscience has been troubling me for ages now... I have no peace of mind... I was planning on how to confess to him before I meet my doom..
My ex boyfriends who is the father of my children is threatening me to give him his children since his wife is unable to conceive for him...
He asked me to explain things to my HUSBANd before he expose it himself...
I love my husband so much I dont wonna hurt him...
I was carried away by my ex sexual performance, he is more romantic than my husband, not that my husband is impotent... But he has small DICK and he is not handsome, so I was securing the future of my children, I want them to look like my ex.. Cos he is handsome..
My selfishness has landed me in trouble, I don't know how to face the world... especially my husband... How can I tell him that my children are not his, how can I tell everybody this ugly incident....
I feel like comiting suicide cos I cant bear the shame..

Solution:.. …..........

MY SELF ESTEEM

She got all dressed, ready to leave for a program. Beholding her reflection on the mirror, came the words; *"Thank you Lord for making me beautiful."*

On getting to the venue of the long expected program, her eyes gazed around in admiration of the well decorated hall creating an ambience of peace. Stilling her eyes was the greeting from an usher whose beaming smile and hand moved directing her to one of the empty seats. She sat feeling all good.

Elating her eyes, she was swept off feet by what was before her-- a perfectly carved bamboo legs well fitted into a stiletto heels, joining an ivory-worked knee well rounded, hips fitting a slim waist which held her upper frame.. _*King Solomon would know how to describe her, for her breast was like a full ripe grape, veiled in a flowery gown, her smile revealed well arranged immaculate white teeth and her natural hair so long and perfectly styled. Truly beauty in perfection. She must be a goddess,*_ Amanda thought.

Amanda who walked in few minutes ago feeling all good about herself, suddenly began feeling uncomfortable -- as she saw nothing good about herself in the light of the "PERFECT LADY".

As she couldn't take it any longer, she excused herself to the restroom and cried her eyes out. *_"Lord,why are you so bias? why didn't you make me fair? Why didn't you make me tall? I can't even pack my hair, 'cause I don't have long hair!"_*

She couldn't wait for the program to end, she left the venue feeling so sad and worthless.

She got home, took out her phone and dialled her mentor's number.

"Hello dear, I thought you told me you were going for a program."...
"Yes ma, but I'm back."
"So soon?"
"Yes ma, I couldn't stay."

"What happened?"

There was silence..........
"Amanda talk to me!"
"What happened?"

With tears.......
"Mom, why is God so bias?  Why? Why?"

"I still don't get you dear, whats going on?"

_*"Mom, I thought I was beautiful, until I met a lady today. Mom you need to see her--  you need to see this lady--she's perfectly beautiful!*_ _*I left the program 'cause I felt so intimidated by her beauty; I saw nothing good about me in her presence."*_

"Wow! Now I understand"
"Do you have your Bible with you?"
"Yes ma."
"Turn to Psalms139:13-18 (NLT) read it aloud."
***
"Hmm, thank you very much ma. I'll call you back ma."

Amanda went down on her knees and reread the passage carefully and meditatively_

_"You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous— how well I know it._

_"You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born._
_Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed._

_"How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!."_
...
Amanda with tears......
"Oh Lord, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry for ever comparing myself with someone, and forgetting all you've written concerning me. Please forgive me and restore me.
Help me to see myself as you do; help me to build my confidence in your Word. I am beautiful; I am wonderfully complete in YOU and I carry your presence. Thank you Lord! Amen.

*"You are fearfully and wonderfully made..You are made and handcrafted by God."*

Twisted Testicle

What causes a twisted testicle
 
Twisted testicle, or torsion of the testicle, occurs when the testis twists around the spermatic cord. This twisting causes compression of the blood vessels to the testis and can cause tissue death. The testis is normally anchored to the scrotum by a ligamentous structure. In some individuals, there may be an anomaly in this anchor, leaving the testis free to move within the scrotum and thereby also twist around the cord. Hidden testis, large testis, and previous trauma to the testis are all risk factors. Testicular torsion usually occurs in newborns, children and around puberty. The common presentation is pain which may be severe, and scrotal swelling and redness. The testis may appear to be higher than normal. Testicular torsion is a medical emergency and requires immediate surgery to relieve the torsion and prevent testicular damage. There is a condition called intermittent testicular torsion where the symptoms are recurrent and may be less severe. Surgery is still advised to prevent tissue death.

Stinky vaginal discharge

Why is my discharge stinking bad️ 
 
The vagina secretes a fluid almost continuously. This fluid helps to clean the vagina and to maintain the pH balance. This is what is seen as vaginal discharge. This vaginal discharge can have a particular odour normally and this odour changes with the period of menstrual cycle.

There are several reasons why your vaginal discharge may have a bad odour. The commonest cause is a condition called bacterial vaginosis. This is causes due to bacterial overgrowth in the vagina and occurs due to change in the pH. It is also commonly seen in women with multiple sexual partners. Other infections like Trichomoniasis and Candidiasis can also cause smelly discharge. Poor hygiene is an important cause of smelly vaginal discharge. A forgotten tampon in the vagina can produce a smell discharge. In some cases, diet can alter the odour of vaginal discharge and a change in diet can give relief. Cancer of the cervix or uterus can also produce a smelly discharge. You should consult a gynaecologist for examination and appropriate treatment if required.

Balance diet-best option than ARV to cure HIV?

Can one live healthy with HIV and AIDS on balanced diet only without arvs
 
In the initial stages of HIV infection, you could probably live a healthy life without taking Anti Retroviral Therapy (ART). However, you would be infective as the viral load would be high. Over time, the virus will destroy the immune system making you prone to contracting various infections and eventually lead to death. A balanced diet alone will not be able to prevent this. ART prevents this from happening. ART controls the multiplication of the virus keeping your viral load at very low to negligible levels. Because of this, the virus cannot destroy the immune system and you remain healthy. The other major effect of ART is that transmissibility of the virus decreases dramatically once your viral load decreases to undetectable levels. It is a good idea to begin ART at the earliest instead of waiting for symptoms to appear.

Infant HIV Detection

Does HIV detect the first week a child is born
 
The usual tests for HIV detect antibodies to the virus. These antibodies are produced by the immune system to fight the virus. Newborn babies do not have any antibodies of their own. They depend on antibodies that have crossed over from the mother across the placenta when the baby was in the womb. So, if the mother was HIV positive, the baby’s blood will also show a positive result to HIV. However, this is due to the presence of maternal antibodies in the baby’s blood. These antibodies may be present in the baby’s blood for upto 3-4 months after birth. There are other tests that can detect HIV RNA and other viral antigens. These tests are more expensive and are done only when there is a strong suspicion that the baby may have contracted infection before or during birth. You must consult with your doctor for more information.

Fight against my Ex

I just find out that my girlfriend still have her ex's phone number what should I do?

You don't need to do anything. Just because your girlfriend still has her ex's phone number, it doesn't mean that she's still not over him, or that she's cheating. She may be completely over him, but still on talking terms with him, which is normal especially if they have mutual friends. The opposite may even be true - she might have his number so that she knows not to pick up the phone when he calls!

Football Fanatic

My boyfriend always uses football as a answer for being offline!

If your boyfriend likes to play football, then it's completely reasonable for him to be offline while playing. It's pretty much impossible to check the phone while playing any sport seriously, perhaps except golf. In any case, it's unhealthy to spend the whole day glued to the screen - you should try spending some time offline every day as well. You should tell him that Duta gives him all the football coverage he could want. That way he can follow football and stay online!

I have one testicle so wat can I do????

 
There’s nothing much you can do about the fact that you have only one testicle. The good news though is that one testicle should be sufficient for fertility. This is presuming that there is no other fertility disorder.

What you should be doing is to consult your doctor to look for the missing testicle. Hidden testis can suffer abnormal development, it can be stuck at an abnormal place and there is also a small but significant chance of it developing a malignancy. If the hidden testis cannot be brought down into the scrotum through surgery, it should be removed to prevent complications.

Boy friend gay relationship

I just found out that my best friend is gay, I'm cool with it but it hurts that I had to find out from elsewhere and to make it worse he had come out to the rest of our friends and told them not to tell me, does it mean he doesn't trust me, I'm confused what should I do?

While it may be true that he didn't trust you, it's sometimes the most difficult to come out to those closest to you. Losing the good opinion of strangers and casual acquaintances is much less scary than things becoming awkward with your best friend, or being rejected by family. Instead of being offended that he didn't trust you, think of it as an indication that he was scared to lose what he has with you, and of course, go talk it over with him!

Trans-dating my ex twin

Is it cool to date my ex's twin brother? After he married another woman?

Well, technically you're not doing anything wrong, but the situation does seem fraught with drama. Make sure you're not using the twin brother as a replacement for your ex - you should be in love with the brother, not the ex. Also be aware that if you end up marrying the brother, your ex will be your brother-in-law, and your ex's wife will be your sister-in-law...hopefully no one will feel too awkward at family functions!

Long Distance Relationship

I'm in a long distance relationship but my boyfriend his talking about marriage how can I leave my country, my job, my family and my friends to be with him is it going to work or not?

If you don't know your boyfriend really well, or have any doubts about the relationship, medos doesn't recommend moving to a different country for him - the risk is too high! If you feel that you know him really well and that he is the one for you, then the relationship may be worth the move...but if you think you will end up being unhappy without your job, family, and friends, the relationship may simply not be worth it anyway. If you are going to make the move, you not only need love, but determination and resolve to make the relationship work and be worthwhile!

Frequent Abortion

What are the causes of recurrent abortion
 
Recurrent pregnancy loss is defined as loss of two or more consecutive pregnancies. There are many causes for this and it is recommended that any couple that has lost three consecutive pregnancies must be fully evaluated. Despite intensive evaluation, no cause may be found in some couples. A major cause of pregnancy loss is decreased maternal immune tolerance to the foetus. During pregnancy, the mother’s immune system is suppressed in order that it does not attack the foetus. In many women it is seen that this suppression may not occur due to many reasons. APLA, and Anti thyroid antibodies are two major reasons for this. In addition chromosomal anomalies in the parents or the foetus can cause loss of pregnancy. Endocrine disorders like hypothyroidism and diabetes mellitus, PCOS, Obesity, Thrombophilic disorders, hormonal factors, infections in the uterus, and structural abnormalities in the uterus can all lead to loss of pregnancy. Lifestyle factors like alcohol intake, smoking etc can also affect pregnancy. A complete evaluation will be required to find out the cause and to offer treatment.

Playing games with two exes

I have 2 ex boyfriends who still treat me like we are still dating how do I send the message that we broke up without being rude?

If you not only have one but two exes who treat you this way, clearly you are being a little too nice and unintentionally sending mixed messages. Next time one of your exes does says or does something inappropriate, tell them "Sorry, but that makes me uncomfortable, we're not dating anymore." It's okay if you come across as a little rude as long as you're not being mean - it's more important that they get the message.

Female beard or hair?

A female at the age of 15 & have a hair on my chin. Is it a beard ?
 
Around the age of puberty, both males and females undergo many changes. These are due to changes in hormonal balance in the body. These changes may take a few months, or even a couple of years to settle. Increased oiliness of the skin and acne are a result of these changes. During this time, it is not unusual for some girls to grow facial hair. The amount and thickness of hair varies with different people. At this point of time you should not really worry about it. If it still persists a few month later, or if you have any menstrual abnormalities also, you should consult a doctor. They may get a few tests done to rule out a few conditions. Until then, you could just use some cosmetic techniques to remove the hair.