Protect Your Wife

 Protect Your Wife

Protect your wife from emotional abuse as well. Your words hold immense power, and the emotional scars they leave can be just as damaging as physical ones.

Treat her with kindness and empathy, always mindful of the impact your words have on her self-esteem and mental well-being.

Protect your wife from financial stress by being a responsible partner. Work together to manage your finances and ensure that she feels secure and supported.

Money matters can be a significant source of tension, so open and honest communication about your financial goals and responsibilities is crucial.

Protect your wife from the daily grind by sharing household and parenting duties. A strong partnership means both of you are equally responsible for the home and the children you're raising.

Strive for a balance that allows her to pursue her own interests and dreams, just as you pursue yours.

Protect your wife by showing her love and appreciation every day. Never take her for granted, and express your affection regularly.

Small gestures of kindness and affirmation go a long way in making her feel cherished and valued in your life.

Protect your wife from societal pressures and expectations. Stand by her choices and support her in pursuing her own path, even if it differs from traditional norms. Celebrate her individuality and the unique qualities that make her who she is.

Remember that protecting your wife is not just about shielding her from external threats but also creating a loving and nurturing environment within your relationship.

It's about being her partner, confidant, and biggest supporter, ensuring that she feels safe, respected, and deeply loved throughout your journey together.

- Abhikesh

How To Choose A Wife/Husband - Dr. Myles Munroe

In choosing a spouse, you must possess and check out for the presence of these traits. They increase the chances of you both being able to live together successful

1. Adaptability

Notice that this is adaptability, not compatibility. Adaptability is a stronger trait for relationships that will work than compatibility. Compatibility focuses on how many things you have in common. It is necessary but there’ll still be differences between you.

Adaptability on the other hand is your ability to adjust to each other regardless of your differences. So the differences wouldn’t be a problem unlike the ones focusing on compatibility.

2. Empathy

Empathy is sensitivity to the needs, hurts, and desires of others—the ability to feel with them and experience the world from their perspective. Love and marriage are a relationship of meeting the needs of the other. If one or both of you aren’t sensitive to the needs of the other person, there’ll be so much dissatisfaction in the union.

3. Ability to work through problems

Claiming to be able to solve every problem is a lie. But a successful marriage is made up of a couple who has decided and remains committed to solving as many problems together as they can and finding their way around the ones they can’t. But you must never pretend problems don’t exist or neglect them.

4. Ability to give and receive love

This is especially important for males. Most females don’t have problems giving and receiving love. But males are pressured by society into believing they must remain tough and hide their emotional needs. While you both must give love, you must also receive love from the other person.

5. Emotional stability

This means being able to control your emotions and not let them run away from you. It means bridling your temper and not making excuses for immature emotional outbursts. This is a product of will more than skill. Everybody has power over their emotions.

Every man knows exactly what he’s doing…

You not feeling loved or important is not a misconception, You feel that way because it is the reality of things.

You feeling confused about your place in his life is not a misconception, You feel out of place because you have no place.

You feeling neglected and uncared for is not a misconception, Men invest wherever their heart is and his isn’t with you.

Many of you have seen all the signs and red flags but refused to accept because you are too afraid to let go and start all over again.

Most men intentionally neglect, maltreat and disrespect you just to frustrate you into leaving them alone but you still stay..

Men are not good pretenders especially for long, It is you who wasn’t paying attention or listening to your gut feeling.

To further validate this theory, Many of you will read and ignore the red flags even though it describes your current situation

THIS TRUTH WILL MAKE THINGS EASY IN YOUR MARRIAGE

Always ask yourself, "What is the outcome I want for my marriage? Is it to to save it and grow my marriage or to end it?"

1. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you holding on to the friend that is causing a rift between you and your spouse?

2. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you not saying sorry for the wrong you know very well you did?

3. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you mistreating and disrespecting your in-laws?

4. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you telling anyone who cares to hear how bad your spouse is?

5. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you not forgiving your spouse and are stuck on his/her past faults?

6. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you insulting or physically harming your spouse?

7. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you not listening to what your spouse is saying to make your spouse feel accommodated?

8. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you threatening your spouse with divorce?

9. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you using sex as a weapon?

10. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you protecting your phone more than your marriage?

11. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you still holding on to the affair that is threatening your marriage?

12. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you refusing to be accountable and refusing to participate in a process where you and your spouse can talk things out or even go through counselling instead of hiding issues?

13. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you letting your pride take over?

14. If your outcome is to save and grow your marriage, why are you using your children to fight your spouse?

THE WOMAN AND HER MENTAL HEALTH

1. Realize the best relationship you can ever have is with yourself. As you care for others, don't forget you

2. Your beauty starts mentally before physically. You have a beautiful body and a beautiful smile, but are you mentally beautiful?

3. Learn to take breaks in life and breathe before you burn out and lose everything

4. Realize in life some unfortunate situations will happen to wake you up and bring to your attention that you have been neglecting yourself. When the situations happen, wake up

5. If you don't like the woman you have become because of your inner struggles, you have the power to change her

6. You can put make up on your face but you can never put make up on your mental state. Either you are really well or not

7. A bad mental state will affect your physical health. If you are getting sickly of late, check your mind

8. Never feel ashamed for prioritizing your mental well-being, even if it means others won't understand you. Only you know the battle for your mind that is taking place

9. Remember to be kind to yourself as much as you are kind to others

10. Don't take in more than you can handle. Don't set yourself up for a mental breakdown. Lessen sources of anxiety

11. Question every negative thought speaking in your mind. Be careful of the voices you give attention to

12. Be truly honest with yourself, in both your strengths and weaknesses. Be balanced. Identify your growing areas without hating yourself. Honesty is the path to healing

13. When you are in the process of healing, don't disrupt it. Heal at your pace, each step of healing counts. You will get there

13. Ask for space when you need it so that you attend to you. Space from responsibilities, space from conversations, space even from work if you need days off

14. People who care about you will respect and celebrate your process of self care

8 LEVELS OF INTIMACY

1. SOCIAL INTIMACY

This is when you enjoy someone's company in public, when you single that person out in public, when you would rather go to places with that one person because you two have a good connection

2. FRIENDSHIP INTIMACY

This is when it grows beyond just spending time to really get to know each other. When you get to know each other's mannerisms, likes, dislikes and invest in more one on one interactions

3. EMOTIONAL INTIMACY

This is when you become bare and unashamed. You two get to share your fears and desires, you two get to talk about things no one else knows, you two don't have rushed conversations but you go deep in unraveling and unveiling each other and loving each other for who you truly are. This intimacy requires no walls, no pretence, you two get to a place where you can say "I feel understood"

4. PHYSICAL INTIMACY

This is when the connection goes to touch. When you two are safe and free with each other and confident in claiming each other that you effortlessly hold hands, locks arms, hold waists, spank each other, hug a little longer and cuddle

6. SENSUAL INTIMACY

This is when you two tease and arouse each other. You flirt as a couple, you turn each other on, you excite each other's senses, you dress up to give each other visual stimulation, you stroke your fingers on each other's skin, you kiss passionately, you make out

7. SEXUAL INTIMACY

This is beyond having sex. This is you two learning each other sexually and giving each other utmost sexual pleasure. This is when you two discover secrets of each other's body and drive each other crazy

8. SPIRITUAL INTIMACY

This is the highest form of intimacy, where you two join God's spirit and God's spirit downloads truths to you. You know things in the spirit about each other, you pray for each other, you see each other not as sexy bodies but human spirits

May your marriage have this 8 levels of intimacy

© Akello Oliech and Dayan Masinde