SECRETS TO HAVING A STRONG RELATIONSHIP

SECRETS TO HAVING A STRONG RELATIONSHIP 💖🤷‍♀🤷‍♂

If you desire a loving and lasting relationship with your partner, you and your partner need to adopt the following habits below:

1. COMMITMENT:

Commitment is very important if you desire to have a strong relationship with your partner. You have to decide to stick with your partner and make the relationship work irrespective of the flaws your partner might have. Couples who renew their commitments everyday, in words and deed, are on their way to having a strong relationship.

2. KEEP YOUR PRIVATE LIFE PRIVATE

When you put your relationship on social media, you invite the public to your relationship. Keep your private matters private. It’s a relationship between you and your partner and not between you, your partner and the public. You can share your fun dates with your partner or some nice photos together on your Facebook or Instagram app but make sure you draw the line where necessary.

3. KNOW WHEN TO LET THINGS SLIDE AND LEARN HOW TO MANAGE CONFLICTS

Finding ways to reduce the frequency of conflict in your relationship by letting go of the little things will help you build a strong relationship with your partner. Arguments are normal in a relationship but you should make sure you never insult your partner during an argument. Always listen to what your partner has to say during an argument.

4. LEARN TO LISTEN

Speaking less and listening more is important if you want to build a strong relationship with your partner. It’s important you always pay close attention to what your partner has to say. Ask your partner how his/her day went and listen to him/her talk about their day.

 5. MAKE TIME TO DATE

Spending quality time with your partner is important if you desire to build a strong relationship. Nothing substitutes for time together. No matter how busy you are, always create time to go out on dates with your partner.

6. BE TOTALLY TRANSPARENT

Partners in strong relationships have no secrets.

Marrying a man with views

Many married women found out too late, the importance of marrying a man whose views of marriage and being a husband involved them making the home the first priority.

It’s important to provide money but there’s so much more than that.

Is this a man who’d be there when you need? A man who’d be able to have conversations with you and not see your need to connect as being petty?

Is this a man who’d carry you along on all issues important?

Is this a man who’d be happy keep trying to be better for you?

Is this a man who’d value the productive time spent at home with you (and the children) as a family unit?

Is this a man whose sense of duty would be to you and the home?

These are critical things to ask. Things many of us wish we had asked.

It is evident in a man’s actions, his values. But how can you pick such a man if you don’t even know the important things to look out for?

-Shamseddin Giwa

Other things that matter

Looks - This includes facial looks, physique, complexion etc

Character: Your behaviour is critical. It includes how you talk and act. If you are well behaved, your chances are better.

Appearance: This will include how you present yourself. You may be pretty but unkempt for example. Stay sharp.

Humility: The average man wants to set up a home to lead, not one where a wife is competing with him.

Financial intelligence and shrewdness: Even where wealthy, he is unlikely to desire a wasteful woman who doesn’t understand the value of money.

Intellect: Be smart enough to support and contribute, be wise enough to not hijack the system.

Have means and direction: With deeper economic realities, a man feels safer with someone who can be a viable backup in case of any need for it. While not compulsory, it is a serious advantage.

Be domesticated: As marriage is likely to come with parenting, having a woman who is comfortable adapting to the biological and parenting needs is critical.

Be adaptable: Situations will vary from time to time, a woman that can adjust positively is a serious asset desired.

Spirituality: Even those not spiritually aligned will often favour a woman who has a solid spiritual side to her with a good balance.

A good name and profile: Obviously, nobody wants to have a wife with a poor record or with an upbringing that’s synonymous with negativity.

Age: While there are those who don’t mind, more times than not, age is a factor.

The above will result in different profiles and combinations because each man is unique but if you know the above and act on it, your chances are better. While there are more men in the world, there are more women seeking husbands meaning you are up against many. 

You can only control what you can but at least let it not be that you are missing out on suitors because you are not paying attention to the things that matter.

-Shamseddin Giwa

A giver can’t be with a taker

A giver can’t be with a taker. They’ll allow you to give to them until you have nothing left to give while rarely ever giving to you because they know that’s just who you are, giving genuinely makes you happy. They don’t even think to include you in any activities in their life but once you think of them and want to include them, they are there. If you are a giver, don’t ever let a taker take advantage of you like that. Go where your energy is reciprocated. Many of you will have this realization soon about someone in your life. It’s not about wanting anything back when you give because you give without ever expecting anything in return but realizing that all they ever really did was take from you. Reciprocation was never in their mind when it came to you.

The truth about a man.

Just because you get thousands of likes on your profile picture will not keep a man. 

Being honest about things in your past will not keep a man. 

Being faithful and loyal since day one doesn't keep a man. 

Treating a man better than he's ever been treated before doesn't keep a man. 

Making an effort every single day to make sure he knows you truly care will not keep a man. 

Giving him all of your time that you can spare, doesn't keep a man. 

You could have the best intentions in the world and could have the most sincere feelings, and you could be the most perfect woman in existence and you still wouldn't be able to keep a man. 

The only way to keep a man is if that man wants to be kept by you. 

With a man, you can tell he wants to be kept when the relationship gets very hard and he does everything to fight for you. 

A man only fights for a woman he wants to belong to, so if he isn't fighting for you when things get hard, then that means he doesn't want to be kept by you anymore. 

Don't hold on to a man who doesn't want to be kept by you. 

You're not giving up on him. It's quite the opposite. 

It's him who gave up on you, and it's you who shouldn't waste any more of your time than you already have. 

Know when it's time to let go, know when it's time to walk away, and know when it's time for him to be unkept. 

~ Cody Bret

SIGNS THAT YOU ARE IN THE WRONG RELATIONSHIP

SIGNS THAT YOU ARE IN THE WRONG RELATIONSHIP – avoid them and safe your life!!!

Good or bad, every relationship has indicators. One common indicator in every wrong relationship is that: 

You cannot be in a wrong relationship and not know.

Surprised? 

As confusing as that sounds, it’s really true. Deep down within you, down, down somewhere there, you will inevitably have that nudging within you that there is something wrong with that relationship.

Here is a list of signs that show that you are in a wrong relationship.

1. YOU ARE NOT YOUR REAL SELF

A wrong relationship will squeeze you up. It sucks also. It will always attempt to make you to adapt to the other person without a corresponding demand on them as well for change and adaptation. You become a shadow of your real self – always trying to be who you are not in order to make someone else accept you, love you, validate and eventually marry you. That is not love. That is a cage, a lifelong one. Get out of it now before it is too late.

2. YOU ARE FULL OF SELF DOUBT

A situation where you aren’t sure of anything. I mean, there are no inner guarantees and assurances within you that everything will be alright. Even when you now seem to be sure, that assurance is short lived – it soon fizzles out into outer space and you are back to square one. You are not always sure about the tomorrow of that relationship. It seems to be looking good today, but you have a feeling everything might soon go south for both of you. 

3. IT BRINGS VITAL RELATIONSHIPS IN YOUR LIFE TO A CLOSE 

There are vital relationships in your life before this lover boy, lover girl came on board your life. Relationships with parents, siblings, mentors, business partners etc. I am talking about relationships upon which your life has been premised before he/she came. Relationships that have added colour and balance to your life. Relationships without which your whole essence is not in view. If those kinds of relationships come to an end, wahala dey