THE LITTLE CLUE THAT YOU DON'T SEE THAT BREAKS MARRIAGE

By Profit Eneh

When I hear stories about people who suffer abuse in their marriage, the story always sounds like there was never a clue that this abusive person can be abusive.

A lot of people subscribe to this school of thought but I have tried to get myself to agree with them but then I can't.

Yesterday I read a story of a lady who shares her story of how she dated her husband for 11 years and 11 months into the marriage they divorced because the man was abusive.

Her story painted a picture of a good man in 11 years and a devil in 11 months. In 11 years of dating, there was no clue that this guy was immature and abusive? No clue? So you believe that?

The issue today is that a lot of people are blinded by good sex, money spent on them, and forget to be doing the real thing why they are in a relationship in the first place.

Money is good, sex is great in marriage but those are not what sustains a marriage, to be honest. They are vital, they make marriage sweet but then there are other vital this you need to watch out for.

Most people are looking for a big red flag before they quit a relationship. Nooo. Seeing the big red flag for example hitting you is good. That's so obvious, but what most people don't see is the little clue like how authoritative he is or how subtle abusive her words can be.

One thing I know is that there is always a clue. Even if they are pretending there is always a clue. People are not just observant and they don't read deeper meaning into what they should actually read meaning to.

When someone's words are not aligning with his actions it's already a clue. A liar.

When someone is always giving excuses for almost everything there is already a clue there. Irresponsibility and blame gamer.

When someone is always too busy. Lack of interest in you.

When someone is never satisfied with what you do. Spirit of comparison.

When they fault you for everything. Possible Narcissistic.

When they threaten to hit you even if they never do. Possible abusive person.

When they always feel right or want it their way all the time. Potential inconsiderate person.

If he is all about women taking care of the home while a man goes to make the money. Possible dream killer.

I can go on and on.

There is always a clue. When you hear people make certain statements don't just brush it off. There could be clues to that person's mindset of how marriage should be which can make your marriage hell on earth.

It's good to be looking for the bigger red flags but don't ignore the little clues here and there.

Ask a lot of questions. Don't allow AC + Cold stone to blow off your brain that you focus on unimportant things and ignore the important things and questions you need to ask and behavior you need to observe.

So the two skill you need is the ability to ask important question and ability to observer unsaid words or actions.

Now the other reason why people fall into this mess of not spotting the clues is because of their irreconcilable value system and this is one topic I will be talking about in-depth in my 5 days training titled from Self Discovery to a Happy and Healthy relationship/marriage. Note: This training is not free. (If you are looking for free training don't contact me please but If you are serious about being a part of it go ahead and send me a message. Come and learn how to win in life and relationships).